24th Sept

Dearest Zeta,

Am thinking fondly of you in rainy Scotland in the California heat. You're so lucky to experience cool, damp days in the mountains when we're here in the sunny mid-twenties, testing new flying engines. It's a hard life!

Cheeky illustration of Monty in sunglasses

Don't forget to write to your old man (and your mother). Otherwise she'll start believing everything Eta writes. I'll be home next week to continue painting another Prewett portrait.

Dad x

29 Sept 2011

Dad,

Did you get this letter? I waited too long to send it, so now I'm not sure if the owl will look for you at home or in California.  Maybe it will get halfway to America then have to turn back over Bermuda. Either way, hellooooo from the paaaaaast.

[Zeta has included a sketch of a very tired owl, no more than a pile of angry feathers]

School is going really good. Bit weird without Theta and Ambrose here, though. Most of my professors are suddenly in a twist with the doom and gloom about how this is NEWTs now and so now it really gets tough. I'm just like OK SURE. If they were that important, they probably wouldn't make kids do them!

Just kidding! I'm going to get a thousand O's and not eat dessert for breakfast and always go to bed on time and only draw flattering portraits of the faculty.

Love, Zeta

M Pepper,
Potton Road
Sandy
Bedfordshire

Zeta Pepper
Hufflepuff Common Room
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Dearest Zeta,

The owl found me closer to home than you feared, though it rested an hour with Harrold[1], looking like little and large. Couldn’t resist the sight on the studio windowsill. Hope Harrold finds you well this morning and isn’t trying to steal your breakfast. Bugger’s always after my toast.

Monty has enclosed a rough ink and watercolour postcard of the two owls, Harrold looking disgruntled and the Hogwarts owl dwarfed in comparison and fast asleep

You are officially the eldest Pepper at school now Ambrose has left. I know you both shared the mantle last year after Theta left, but now you are unofficially Pepper-in-charge at school (unless your uncle counts). Your mother expects responsibility, maturity, consideration from you. She asks if you are getting enough sleep and if you are remembering to cleanse, tone and exfoliate. Apparently that’s about your face.

I don’t know, your grandmother used to remind me and Francis to shave and be polite to girls. I’d say be polite to boys but all boys at your age are idiots. I was one. I should know! They best be polite to you, but remember if any of them are too polite and too close I will need his name and house so I can turn up and read him the father’s riot act in Hogsmeade before he can touch my beloved daughter.

I’d also like to remind you it’s cheaper for me for you to stay there and not eat us out of house and home and steal my art supplies! Just don’t get yourself expelled, as I told you before you left, remember Icarus when choosing the altitude to fly at.

Do your best. That’s all we ask of you. But if you’re going to follow in your old man’s footsteps, best let me know by Easter if I’m setting up a second easel for my next sitter, or if we’re leaving Eta with your mother for the summer…

If you score an E on your term test in Defences I’ll pick you up from school in the car.

Lots of Love,

Dad x

1.	Monty’s strong eagle owl which carries his parcels, though becoming long in the tooth

The envelope is brightly adorned leaving clear pockets just big enough for the addresses. Zeta has covered it in a geometric free-form labyrinth in a sparkling silver ink.


Dad,

Why does everyone think I'm suddenly dropping out of school??? Have a little faith, father. I'm not going to dance merrily off a cliff into adulthood. (I'm going to drive off one in your car.) Honestly, it's fine! I don't know what I want to be when I grow up anyway. When did you figure out you wanted to paint naked people? Nevermind. Don't answer that.

Tell mum I'm exfoliating. Got her apricot scrub last week and I've abraded my skin off just the right amount. I'm absolutely glowing. I sent her back some plum lipstick from Lipwitch.

Anyway, the Hogwarts Howler has started back up and I'm adding an Arts and Culture section this year. This school could use a little culture, don't you think? Going to see if I can get people to submit art or poetry or maybe do some fashion pieces. I know some people who like music and might review records. Way more interesting than boys.

Love you!
- Zeta

P.S. Quick question: are any of your paintings in Hogwarts? I might have told Kari Strong there were and now I'm on the hook to prove it.

M Pepper,
Potton Road
Sandy
Bedfordshire

Zeta Pepper
Hufflepuff Common Room
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Dearest Zeta,

Why does everyone think you’re suddenly dropping out of school? Because you take after me? Too cool for school.

He has inked a small cartoon of himself winking, in the margin.

There’s only ever been one naked portrait - Bagnold - and it wasn’t even from a sitter! Though because it was the one that made people notice me, it is something that sticks in the memory. Trust me, teenage me wanted to paint things like that but he got into terrible trouble ASKING girls. Francis and Gwydion were always doing inventions and I always knew he’d follow your granddad into the family trade, so I wanted to do something different. Something that made me happy and people thought well of me for. You know? I didn’t ever think I’d make a career out of it, until I met someone who did it.

As for my paintings. I restored countless ones after the Battle of Hogwarts. Ask Anne Boleyn - she’s on the grand staircase, near the second floor I think. She was at our house for over a year. Had you forgotten we had royalty with us all that time? Try Lazarus Rippringham-Gomfrey, Merlin rest his soul. Poor bloke was turned inside out. He passed before his time and as such, his portrait’s responses aren’t all that detailed. Think he was destined for the third floor corridor, though Sir Cadogan can tell you if he found another home.

Send me a copy of the HH when you’re published. I’ll frame them and tell all the neighbours my daughter’s published. I’m sure your caricatures will go down very well with the readers, less with the teachers, but that’s the whole point.

I’ve got Favian Forestcue coming round in a minute, and I’ve just realised I’ve still got baby vomit on me from visiting uncle Francis and Gabbie. This is about a summary of life back home right now. You’re missing nothing. Start making that America bucket-list…

He has enclosed a fold out map of magical north America for her perusal

Lots of Love,

Dad x

PS. Your mum thanks you for the lipstick, though she’ll write you her own letter soon I’m sure. Biro and lined notepaper, of course. She muttered about whether they did anti-ageing cream for me. I’m not that old!

Dad,

It's probably cliche to say sorry I didn't write sooner, things have just been really busy. Turns out NEWT classes are difficult? I thought OWLs year was a bit much and that maybe we'd get a break this year, but um no. It's like we're being punished for not having big exams this year.

Howler's off like comet, careening through the cosmos shedding ice and debris. A bunch of  younger students are lining up for silly portraits since seeing my editorial illustrations. Either of themselves or professor Onuris. He'll never live down that shirtless swim lesson, I'm quite sure.

Thanks for the tip on where to find your work in the castle. Kari enjoyed eating crow. Or she didn't. She's terrible. I think I'll enjoy drawing her.

I heard about the dementors at St Mungo's. WHAT HAPPENED? I know I know wrong department pish posh, but is Ambrose alright? You heard anything? Honestly, that boy will be the death of me.

P.S. Can't believe you didn't include a picture of Uncle Francis's baby. Shame! I shall now begin withholding any baby pictures I might have from you. Consider it ransom!

Attached is the map of the US with star stickers plastered from coast to coast and a few in Canada and Mexico as well. Items include theme parks in Florida, space needles in Washington, whales in Alaska, art museums in Chicago, CATS in New York City (Zeta unaware that its run ended in 2006), and Carhenge in Nebraska.

M Pepper,
Potton Road
Sandy
Bedfordshire

Zeta Pepper
Hufflepuff Common Room
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Z * E * T * A

Spoke to your mum and she agrees that keeping you and Eta occupied this Christmas is a good call. I have sent permission this morning. If you get good parts we will be sure to book tickets for the whole family. So we can heckle see your shining moment!

Have framed the latest issue of the Howler in the downstairs loo.

Lots of Love,

Dad x

Zeta Pepper
Hufflepuff Common Room
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Mum and Dad Pepper
Potton Road
Sandy
Bedfordshire

Mums & Dads,

thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou! This is going to be best Christmas ever! Theta's said I can stay with her in London which will work perfectly for those late night rehearsals. I'm going to try for Ghost of Christmas past. Spooky, ethereal, wise, the power of flight, time-travel? Seems like the perfect Pepper, must say. There aren't loads of good parts for girls, honestly. Maybe the director will be flexible on gender? I'd like playing Fred as well, antagonizing old humbug.

Oh, big favor. Can you send my black cardigan along? The one with all the patches? I think I left it hanging off the bed. Getting c-c-c-c-old.

Love-love,
Zeta