With the exciting approach of Valentine’s Day, I went on a little mission of my own to track down some very eligible and engaging gentlemen to provide all of you witches out there with a plethora of choice. Earlier this week, I was treated to a tête à tête with the tantalisingly charming and wondrously mysterious Head of the Department of Mysteries, Yavin Morgenthau. Let’s call him Mr M for Mysterious, shall we?

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Queen G:

Mr Yavin Morgenthau. Writer of books, fixer of heads and keeper of secrets, what a pleasure this is. Tell me, will you be a breaker of hearts this year, too? Or are you looking for a lonely one to piece back together?

Mr M:

Why, Queen G, monarch of ink-dripping hearts, the, ah, the pleasure is all mine. I’ve never been much of a, um, what they call a player so here’s to hoping you’ll find me doing neither. Love comes when you, I mean, when you least expect it… but I do think it helps to give it a fighting chance, don’t you? Keep the door a little, ahah, a little open?

Queen G:

Would that be the mental door? I must admit, while I have tried to read your decidedly successful book, it went a little over my head. I’m not sure that I imagined such a romantic from what I did manage to read.

Mr M:

Oh, no no. The door of one’s heart. I’m very, hm, very passionate about my work but there’s no reason to ah, talk shop at every opportunity. All work and no play…

Queen G:

Oh we’re experts about play here at the Weekly, Mr M. You don’t mind me calling you Mr M, do you? I’d rather like to think it means mysterious. I expect you have a lot of mysteries hiding under that adorable sweatshirt. We’re rather hoping you might share some.

Mr M:

I, hah, I quite like Mr M. Contrary to popular belief my, um, my life’s an open book. Back when I first came to these shores, one of your predecessors did try, ah, try to dig out the answers to a few question marks.

Have you done the homework, your royal highness?

Queen G:

I’m a good girl, I always do my homework [insert trademark queen G wink here, ladies].

A little birdie did happen to tell me about you being rather a naughty boy in the last decade. Some of our readers might remember a certain November edition in 2002 that mentions you and some very personal relations with a rather adventurous couple. You were all quite tight lipped at the time. Care to sate our curiosity now?i

Mr M:

Now why, ahah, why would I do that? Wizards like me with so few secrets in our, hm, in our personal lives, we must safely keep the ones we do have.

Queen G:

Open book, or man of mystery, Mr M? You wouldn’t disappoint our readers with such coyness, would you? I hear you had a wildly dramatic time. Quite the scene, shall we say?

Mr M:

Dramatic was more Edgar’s area if we’re being frank….

[light laughter]

There’s something to be, hm, to be said about public imagination. What if reality falls shorts? I’d hate to, uh, to be a disappointment.

Queen G:

The imaginations of our readers run rather wild, sweetie; you’re putting yourself in dangerous hands. But perhaps you enjoy that? A little bit of danger to ignite your fire?

Mr M:

I don’t think anyone wants, hm, wants ‘calm and steady’ for the entirety of a romance. Danger’s an aphrodisiac.

Queen G:

I’ll take your word for it. Now, you have bravely put your love life in the capable hands of Witch Weekly, haven’t you? Signing up to our blind date event is quite the bold move. Dangerous, perhaps. What sort of witch are you hoping to open doors with on the 11th?

Mr M:

Or wizard.

I try not to have expectations. Useful in a, hm, in a professional environment, but I prefer to be surprised where matters of the heart are concerned. Or matters of, ah, of friendship, if I’m not to the lady or gentleman’s liking.

Queen G:

I’d have expected a man of your statue to be decidedly discerning. You are quite the enigma, Mr M. Perhaps I shouldn’t be surprised.

So tell me, are you actively looking for love? I imagine you are waiting for it to find you? Don’t sit around too long, darling. Love moves fast.

Mr M:

Actively? Aha, not exactly. I’m open to love.

It found me once. My late wife and I met, hm… about forty years ago. I don’t think I can expect to be so lucky, hah, so lucky twice in a single lifetime. She would hate if I gave up, though, without giving it a good old college try.

Queen G:

Then you must go for it, mustn’t you? I guess we’ll have to wait with anticipation for your date on the 11th? You will catch up with me and let me know if love found you?

Mr M:

It’s the, haha, the least I can do for our reigning empress.

Queen G:

You’re too kind, Mr M. Thank you so much for joining me here in my little Queendom, and I think that I can say on behalf of our wonderful readers, we hope lightning strikes twice.