Chance was hanging out in the Gryffindor common room...again.  He'd been doing that quite a lot lately.  Since Fauna's birthday party, he'd been hanging out and keeping an attentive eye out for Sophie Flickwick.  He was concerned about some of the things Sophie had said...and just how Sophie had been acting lately overall.

Chance would idly strum a bit on his guitar, while glancing about every now and then...keeping a look out for Sophie.  Chance had recently gotten a haircut from the shaggy length that it had attained.  The Irish Gryffindor was finally looking like himself again.  He had kept a five o'clock shadow though, which seemed the only physical difference from the times before his world seemed to have a collision with  misfortune.

Chance was wearing the lion hoodie that Sophie had given him...along with a pair of black boots and jeans.  He was also wearing a familiar set of bracelets...He muttered below his breath, the muggle song "Careless Whisper", though Chance's version sounded more like the gruffer cover performed by Seether.

"An' ah'm nev'r gunna dance again...cuz guilty feet've got no rhythm..."

Since Winnie's little "secret" share at Fauna's party Sophie had been keeping to herself for fear of ripping people's heads off. It made her so angry! Even Fig, who was treating it like a joke; like he treated everything made her mad. That stupid song he made up, she was not impressed. Werewolf accusations were serious, it could get Fauna into a lot of trouble; a lot of trouble that maybe even Ramona couldn't protect her from. People talked about it like it was nothing, like they weren't potentially ruining her life. And as angry as she was about that she'd been avoiding the girl herself because Sophie didn't think she could look at Fauna without ripping into her for leading Chance on a second time. She loved Fauna like a sister but Chance... Chance deserved so much more than to be some rebound from Devlin. She didn't know if he could take going through all that again... she didn't know if she could take watching all that again.

So she'd doubled down on her studies. she even spent less time with Figaro. Her face was familiar around the library though she avoided Master Morgan at all costs. She and Fergie were alright, she supposed, they hadn't talked about what was going on. It felt awful to have him on the outside. Still, she kept it under her cap. When she really needed to talk she wrote home to her father. She'd given Ramona a heads up about the utter disaster that was turning into Fauna's life and everyone told her not to worry so much. There was something coming though; something bad. She could feel it in her bones. The harder she tried to read the cards the more blurry their meaning became. She slept dreamless sleep and there were no visions to give her the forewarning she craved.

When Sophie finally drug herself through the common room she felt her heart tighten in her chest as she spotted Chance. He was... back to himself, singing in the common room; hair less shaggy. He didn't look happy of course, but then with the sort of music he was apt to sing it was hard to look happy. She felt like a doom duelist caught in the crosshairs. Had he seen her? They hadn't talked since the party; she felt both guilty and annoyed with him. She didn't trust herself not to say hateful things. She wanted to be able to speak to him calmly and rationally; but the problem with loving someone (however you loved them) was that you became irrational. Their wellbeing meant something to you and when it was their own foolishness putting them at risk for real heartache when you had just helped them put back the pieces... so she sort of just stood there chewing on her bottom lip wondering if she could still make a run for it.

Chance hadn't the foggiest idea what Winnie had drug Sophie off for...Winnie was one of the most socially unpredictable people he'd ever met.    There was no telling what the girl lacking the word filter would say next!  Chance had been a victim of awkwardness himself at Fauna's birthday party when Winnie started rather inappropriately and naively describing "bases."

Sophie had been scarce...which was strange for the bubbly, social butterfly.  Chance didn't like it.  Sophie was like a comforting, warm fire that everyone drew near and huddled around on a cold winter's night.  She was comforting, relaxing, and rejuvenating.  Sophie had truly been there for Chance and he hoped she never needed him like he had needed her, but he did hope to repay her somehow.

Chance stopped immediately, perking up and straightening up visibly before popping out of his seat and setting his guitar down.  He trotted over toward the door and scooped her up in a big, warm hug.

"Yer gettin' a squishin', wee, lit'l miss!  Why've y'been Shadow Sophie lately, hmm?"

So, no time to run then. No where to hide - it wasn't until he scooped her up in a hug that she even felt a smile crack her formerly frantically frozen features. Without any thought at all to the fact she was mad at and worried about him. She just wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder. She even gave the appropriate squeal and picked her feet up off the ground and he swung her around. In the back of her mind she wondered what it meant that they were like this, and just why they had never talked about the fact that she had kissed him and she thought he had kissed her back. Was it normal to be like this with someone? Even with Fergie or Fir it wasn't...it wasn't exactly like this. It certainly wasn't like this with Fig. No with Fig it was something all together different.

Though her forehead was still resting against his jawline she felt herself frown at his question. How much did he know about Fauna? Had he heard the song and rumors? Was that going to be his excuse for riding in like a knight in shining armor? He wasn't that underhanded but if he tried to save Fauna she might toy with him some more. That wasn't fair really, Fauna didn't do it on purpose (at least Sophie didn't think she did it on purpose).  When her feet finally touched back to the ground she stepped enough away to look into his face - but not let go completely. She rested her small hands on his upper arms and her smile waned, "OWLs are coming up. Don't want to Troll out," she was such a wretched liar. She couldn't even look him in the eye when she said it. She was so scared of being selfish with him again, of getting angry and hurting him - saying things out of spite instead of truth.

She could be such a horrible person sometimes.

The very notion that Sophie might have wanted to flee from Chance would have been quite alarming, had he realized it.  Still...it always felt good to hug the little Flickwick girl.  There were no worries about what Sophie was really thinking or how she really felt.  She had always been reliable, even though there were moments of emotional...whimsy.

Sophie's poor little head must surely have been aching with all of these thoughts running through her head.  Chance canted his head on an angle to peer down at her as he eased her down to the floor.

"Yer such a shoddy, ruddy liar Soph...Why y'lyin' anyway?" 

Sophie not looking at him while she was talking was an instant tell.  The only times she would ever do that were when she was busy flitting about getting something accomplished physically...multitasking.  And even sometimes then she made certain to look at him when she spoke.  Something surely was wrong.  But what?

"What's wrong, lass?"

Sophie looked at him. She bit her bottom lip. Then she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "I am mad at you. I am mad at Fauna. I am mad and the whole stinking world and I think all of it is stupid and no one seems to understand how serious stupid rumors can be or what can happen when they get out of control". There she said it. She hated saying out loud she was mad at him. She didn't have the right. She shouldn't have felt betrayed when he looked at Fauna with such longing. First of all she had a boyfriend why the hell did she care who Chance Ryker looked at with longing? Secondly Chance was a big boy and capable of taking care of himself - only he did a bad job of it sometimes and then she felt like she had to save him. She couldn't keep saving everybody... but who was everybody?

Erin? She didn't really save him; she tried to cheer him up. She couldn't save Gabby from her own anger and guilt that swallowed her up. She couldn't save Madison from the same problem. What good was she to anyone else? Would she have even gotten angry at anyone else for being foolish enough to go chasing after the same rainbow that had hurt them before? Would she be this angry with Maddy over Ferris? She didn't think so. There wouldn't have been the feeling of being replaced by someone far less worthy. How could she think that about Fauna? Fauna who had been like her sister, Fauna who was dealing with knowing finally how awful Devlin was; and the fact her father was a bastard...and now the werewolf rumors. How could she think and feel such green eyed hatred for someone she had loved so much?

Was her heart that fickle? One mistake and you're out? She couldn't or wouldn't but the name jealousy on it - it made it too messy. She didn't want to think that in all the time they'd spent together that Chance was more than just her best friend. She didn't want to think that even though he didn't give her the giddy butterflies Fig once had that she loved him in a way that was so much bigger than her tiny body. She didn't want to love someone else that Fauna had. Being used by Devlin, never hearing him apologize, realizing that she had never been that important to him... she couldn't go through that again with Chance. When you loved someone you had to put too much of yourself out there, parts of you you might never get back...and she knew in the way he looked at her she was more like a baby sister; the person he could fall back on but never fall for. And it hurt like a snake bite.

Ryker was stunned by Sophie's revelation.  She was angry at he and Fauna?  His features twisted somewhat, showing sadness and confusion...but if Sophie was mad at him, surely it must be his fault.  He watched her for a few moments, trying to grasp the concept of Sophie being truly angry with him.  They'd had their little spats before, like anyone who was close enough to truly matter in the grand scheme of things, but...to be truly angry with one another?  That was another thing entirely.

"Wh-what'd ah do?  Why're y'mad at me?"

Chance was afraid.  The way that she hugged him didn't seem to imply she was angry.  Was that the goodbye hug?  Was he now about to lose his treasured Sophie like he'd lost his family?  Like he'd "lost" Myrni?  Like he'd...lost Fauna in a way?  Would Grace be next?  Was there any true dependability in his life anymore?  Would he ever be able to believe that loved ones of the day would be there for the morrow?  Chance had found himself asking such questions in his long months of silence and solitude...and now they were returning to rear their ugly heads.

"C'mere...can we sit...?  Talk 'bout this?"

Chance ushered her to a couch to sit so that they could speak.  Of course if she preferred to go on a walk, the Gryffindor prefect was more than willing to accommodate her.  This was just the first thing that came to mind...

There was that quiver of fear in his voice, his bafflement, that wounded look - it broke her heart into a million pieces and without thinking she threw her arms back around him and buried her face in his shoulder. She clung to him for a minute; wanting to apologize for being so abrupt about it. There should have been a better way of saying she was upset than saying she was angry with him. The thing about Chance was... even if he was stupid about Fauna, even if he put himself out there all over again and she had to pick up the pieces when he got hurt; she wouldn't ever give up on him. She was not going to cry. She was not going to scream. She was going to sit down and calmly tell him why she was angry. She could do that much...maybe.

Taking a deep breath she moved toward the couch with him, her head hanging. She was doing right now what she had been worried about everyone else doing to him. She could tell she had hurt him. She hated that feeling more than anything in the world. Still she sat, her eyes locked onto the fire waiting for him to say something. When he didn't she scooted back and hugged her knees, turning her head to look at him; "I care about you so much Chance. I've tried so hard to make... finding your way back easy - but I see the way you look at her. I see your big green eyes just gaze at her like she can do no wrong," she looked away then, into the fire her voice small. She had to stop speaking for a minute because she could feel her throat closing up.

"You look at her like she is the most amazing person on Earth...but who was there when you were all alone? Who was there when you couldn't find yourself? Because I sure as hell don't think it was Miss Fauna Fecking Blake, Chance. She chose Devlin over you. She chose Devlin over me. I admit I was stupid about him for a long time too but she let him control her... and now you just act like none of that happened". Raking her fingers through her dark hair she turned to look at him again, "Do you know what thats like? To have to help someone put themselves back together again only to have them go chasing after the same thing that broke them before"?

It hurt to look at him because of the expression on his face. Bewildered, bothered, not bewitched of course because Sophie wasn't bewitching. She was small and petty and apparently more selfish than she had ever thought possible. Did she really begrudge Fauna that stupid locket? Sophie wasn't big on trinkets. She didn't need presents thrown at her - but to watch his eyes get so happy and to listen to everyone talk about how fabulous they would be together...and stupid Winnie. And all the rumors about Fauna being a werewolf, Sophie felt like a disloyal friend anyway she sliced it - though she was going to punch Sasha in the junk the first chance she got. It wasn't about that now, it was about Chance. Finally she sighed and looked toward the tower rafters, "Chalk it up to jealousy I suppose".

The young Irishman was once again surprised by Sophie's abrupt behavior.  Of course he would always return a hug that he received from her.  Just what was going on with the sweet little Gryffindor?

Chance watched Sophie...and noted how her eyes wandered off.  This was highly unusual.  He kept trying to search her features, to discern just what was going on in her mind.  But when he referenced "her"...things started becoming clearer.  Chance couldn't help but feel ashamed when Sophie mentioned the way he had previously been embarrassed and heartbroken over Fauna.

"Ah know y'were there fer me...Ah know that.  An' ah really appreciate it...Dunno what ah'd do without ya actually, Soph.  An' Grace too...but Fauna did try too.  She didn' jes' ferget 'bout me, y'know?  It was jes' awkward for 'er...fer us."

As Sophie went on...Chance nodded and listened.

"She loved 'im, Sophie...Girls don't always 'ave th' best taste in guys.  She wanted t'believe th' best, jes' like y'did.  Y'didn' wanna listen to me 'bout 'im...an' ah couldn't really say much t'er 'bout it." 

[i["Do you know what that's like? To have to help someone put themselves back together again only to have them go chasing after the same thing that broke them before?"[/i]

And now Chance felt dumbstruck...bowing his head and lowering his head to the floor for several long moments.  Was she right?  It was only when Sophie "chalked it up to jealousy" that Chance looked back to her.

"Whadda y'mean?"

Holding her head in her hands she shook it, trying to keep her voice calm before finally looking back at him, "Don't DO that Chance. He used me to hurt her; he used me and hurt me, then she sent that stupid letter after. That apology that was not and apology and because I wanted life to go back to normal and because I didn't want to fight anymore I went with it. I let it go... but I can't watch her break your heart again. She did nothing to help fix it until it was almost too late". Sophie felt like she had to move away from him them because the pain in her chest was too much, she was finding it hard to breathe

"When I think about all those weeks you felt unloved. All the time before that, when her being with him made you feel so bad about yourself, made you question what you were worth; how she could care so much about someone who was such a fraud," she turned to look at him finally again, bitting her bottom lip. She took a deep breath in through her nose and let it out slowly past her lips before she reached over and took his hand, "Do you remember what I told you that night? When you walked me into the party?" she didn't wait for him to confirm or deny whether or not he remembered, "I told you that you were amazing; and that someday everyone would see that... I have always seen you Chance," she sucked on her bottom lip before looking away again.

"But when she's around you don't see the forest for the trees. Things are about to get ugly around our hallowed halls and I know you. I know you're going to rush to protect her - and I am not saying you shouldn't... I finally figured out out how you really know you love someone more than anything in the world". She used the hand not in his to rub the bridge of her nose before she finally turned to look a him fully; "I knew I loved you, maybe too much because when your heart broke mine broke too... and I can't protect you from yourself, from the way you're going to chase after her and completely forget about how she hurt you before and how it was me, it was me Chance that picked up the pieces. I'm one who stayed up half the night to corner you, to make you tell me why you were pulling away from everyone? Where was Fauna? Where was Grace? Where was Kimmy? Because unless they were hiding behind those red curtains they sure as hell weren't here. And they weren't here the next day or the next or the next. I watched you suffer and feel alone and I couldn't make it better...but you act like it was a team effort," surprisingly there was no venom to her voice, just hurt...and worry.

Chance looked on as Sophie seemed to be attempting to calm herself before speaking.  He didn't really know what this letter was that Sophie was talking about...but he put 2 and 2 together to figure it out for context.

"Y'know 'ow ruddy shy she is.  She was as uncomfortable as ah was 'bout th' 'ole mess!"

Sophie was causing doubt to creep into his mind though.  It wasn't that difficult to do when doubt had such a stronghold on him recently.  Chance clicked his tongue across his teeth absently...The timeline that Sophie was going over was not a comfortable one to relive, but he simply nodded in acknowledgment of the truth she spoke.
But then the ominous way that Sophie started speaking troubled him.

"Didjoo see somethin', lass?  What izzit?"*

The way Sophie spoke had Chance confused.  He was still very concerned about the dangerous tone in which she had previously spoken in...yet now he wasn't sure where she was going with this. 

"Ah told ya that others 'elped...Not really Kim...She 'asn' really spoken more than three words t'me since..."

And now another loss had been revealed.  Chance's former best friend "Kim Kim" Chan had all but deserted him in his time of grief.  She'd said something about needing to surround herself with "positive people" and that Chance was only "dragging her down" and sadly he could see the truth in her words.  He'd just hoped she would have seen more reliability after their years of friendship...but maybe he didn't know her as well as he thought he had.

On another note...Chance and Sophie had told each other "i love you" so many times that the powerful word wasn't shocking to either of them. 

"Ya'd ruddy better realize ah love y'too.  Yer actin' like I dunno 'ow important y'are or all y've done fer me...but ah do!  Yer amazin' an' ah don' really d'serve somebody like you...doin' all that y'do fer me.  Ah'm lucky.  'Chance' means 'good fortune' sometimes y'know?"

Chance inhaled deeply and released her hand, tossing both of his up and letting them fall back atop his own legs.

"Ah dunno whatcha want me t'say, Sophers...?"

*Pretty sure Chance knows about Sophie's seer abilities, but if not...will edit!*

Sophie looked at him and sighed, "What world do you live in Chance that you haven't heard the rumors? Everyone is talking like Fauna is a werewolf and has been since Halloween and things are going to get really ugly for her. I can feel it. They fling these stupid stories; like they're not going to ruin someone's life. Like the word werewolf doesn't already cause a sense of hysteria in adults. Damn Winnie was running her mouth about it at the party! It's why I left". Well, that wasn't totally true, she left because she wasn't having any fun and she didn't trust herself not to cause a scene.

"And I know you, and I know that you're going to play white knight - and you're going to think that you'll be together if you can just save her," oh there was that bitterness. It burned her throat and mouth as she said it. Why was she so bitter? Why did she want to begrudge him this chance for something he'd wanted so long? Because he would forget about her? Because there would be someone else with his hugs and his time? Because she was selfish enough to want to have her cake and eat it too? She was acting like a jealous girlfriend - when in reality she had no claim on Chance and she wouldn't have given two shits what Fig did in this situation. Well, ok she cared that he made up that stupid song and wanted to rip him to pieces over it but... it wasn't this bile inducing jealousy.

So much of Sophie's life was a gray area it was amazing that in some context she still held such a black and white view of the world. She had been forced to confront the last few months that there was no absolute right or wrong in life unless it was on a test - even then your answer could probably be argued. Why did she see Chance in such black and white? Why did she equate him caring for Fauna with him loving her less? She didn't have the answer - but she didn't want to fight because it was all so confused inside of her. Who was she supposed to take care of in this situation? People forgot - because Sophie tried to make them forget that she was only 15. She was trying to take on real world issues so much bigger than her tiny self but she was finding she didn't have the coping skills.

She looked at him helplessly, once again hugging her knees and resting her cheek atop them; "I don't know why it hurts Chance. I just know that it does. I see it and get so angry that you can be so forgiving... and it doesn't make any sense because I love that you're so forgiving, so willing to look past people's flaws - to look past my flaws. It just makes my stomach hurt and I get all flustered and I want to yell at her not to lead you on but I'm more afraid that she finally knows the secret that has been just mine all along...that you are the sweetest most wonderful boy in the history of the world...and she'll take that away". Now she was rambling about things she didn't even understand herself. She was pretty sure Chance would think she'd lost her mind.

Chance cleared his throat somewhat...thinking that Sophie knew EXACTLY what "world" he had been in over the past few months.  He barely saw the light of day up until recently...and was never one for the gossip train.  And it was also highly likely with the strong vibe flowing between Fauna and he...that Chance would be second to last to hear about any bad rumor involving Fauna...second to last only next to Fauna herself.  It was shocking to hear and curse words coming from Sophie's mouth stung, even if they weren't aimed at him.  There was such a sourness and outrage in his precious little Sophie that it hurt and frightened him for her well being.

"Ah....didn' really know, Soph."

Once Sophie compared him to a white knight, Chance couldn't help but wonder what on earth he could do to help Fauna in this bizarre situation.  But of course as it would still take time for him to figure out this whole werewolf mess...he was rather preoccupied on what he could do to help Sophie.  This wasn't right.  Something was very, very wrong indeed.

Chance felt such an overpowering loss for words that he could do little more than wrap an arm around Sophie's slender shoulders, pulling her to his side and connecting his other arm in a sideways hug before he kissed her forehead gently.

"Sophers...yer scarin' me, luv.  Ah'm worried 'bout you."

And then she began to let the flurry of compliments fly, topping it all off with the nuclear bomb of compliments by calling Chance "the sweetest most wonderful boy in the history of the world."

"Sophie...no matter if Fauna an' I get t'gether or don' get t'gether...yer always gonna be special t'me.  Ah jes' can' believe y'd think anything'd change that!  I ruddy love ya t'bits, lass!"

Chance's unnaturally green eyes were filling with an all too natural substance as they shimmered with moisture down to Sophie.  Couldn't she see how much she meant to him?

Sophie couldn't look at him, she just rested her head against his shoulder and took a deep breath. She would not let herself cry. She didn't have the right to cry. She was just so ashamed of herself; ashamed that she was selfish, ashamed that she could be so petty - and in the face of all that he'd still tell her how important she was; how much he needed her. But it would change, if he and Fauna were together - if he and anyone were together. It would change and he wouldn't need her anymore and she would be forgotten. She would be overlooked...like always. It had been awhile since Sophie had felt that sickness in her stomach; the comparing herself to other people. She'd spent her whole life trying to make a shadow for herself. She was just swallowed up by how talented Johnny was, how smart Emer was, how unwaveringly good and righteous Ruby was. Ruby would never get swept away by jealously. She would know how to be Chance's best friend and let him make his mistakes. She would know how to help Fauna. She would keep her temper. Sophie couldn't.

It was like she was Tinkerbell from that muggle book. She was only big enough for one emotion at a time. She was either giddy happy, or consumed with sadness, boiling with anger - there wasn't room inside of her for all of these conflicting emotions to exist at once. When it happened her brain seemed to short circuit and she didn't know what to do with herself. She hated that feeling. She hated being so selfish. She hated that she was hurting and scaring Chance right now because she wasn't grown up enough to admit this all had to do with the way she felt about him. She couldn't quite wrap her mind around the feeling that maybe Chance was the only person who really saw her and loved her anyway. Even with her Da, as much as he knew, she always felt that she had to be his little girl, his little Monkey Princess. If Chance wasn't there to see her because he was seeing all of someone else Sophie thought she might cease to exist. 

Finally she looked at him, her bottom lip mottled from the way she'd been chewing on it. She reached up at him and brushed a tear from the corner of his eye, "Don't do that. I can't bear it when you look sound hurt and I'm the reason. I'm just...being selfish," it was easier to pull it all back on herself. "I want to keep you safe, but I want to keep you safe in the selfish way; the way that keeps you all to myself. That isn't fair. I know it isn't. I'm trying," she gave him a small smile, though it was a little sad, "See, you never believed I was a selfish awful person. Now I've gone and proven it because I want to keep you all for myself," she was trying to joke but there was a sick kind of truth to her words. She didn't want him to look at Fauna with such longing... the deepest most secret corners of her heart wanted him to look at her that way - only she'd probably never put the dots together, "I'm sorry". 

Chance had to release a sigh.  He didn't really know what to do or say in this series of circumstances.  The Irish prefect lowered his eyes in thought.  How did Fauna really feel about him anyway?  She had to have cared.  Why else would she have made any effort to reestablish their friendship?  Why would she be getting all blushy and flustered around him if she wasn't attracted to him?  Surely Fauna wasn't some manipulator just using him...Surely Sophie was reading into things and putting a spin on them.  Wasn't she?

Sophie may have felt overwhelmed and thus viewed many things in the world out of their actual context and perspective from her emotionally compromised vantage point...and she certainly didn't seem to add that while her siblings had their own individual expertise, Sophie was his favorite.  Chance had always been closest to Sophie out of all the Flickwick clan.  And now she was his closest friend with seniority at Hogwart's...or anywhere else for that matter.  If only Sophie saw the wonderment that Chance saw in her for herself.

Chance shook his head in a negative response, pushing aside her apologies and explanations.

"Just 'old on fer a second..."

And Chance just held onto Sophie there.  He couldn't catch up with his own train of thought, let alone compete with Sophie's dizzying whirlwind of emotions.

"Ah appreciate all yer tryin' t'do fer me, Sophers.  Ah really think everything'll be okay though...an' you an' me-we're tight ferever.  I really an' truly do believe 'at!"