Candy had been holed up in her flat since Saturday wallowing in misery. She had devoured so much food and so many sweets she had nearly made herself sick, and hadn't left the house since she had been sacked. A handful of people from the ministry had owled her to find out if she was okay (and to try to pry the truth from her about what happened), but she hadn't answered any of the owls. Candice just didn't want to talk about it. To anyone. She wanted to lay in bed forever. Or at least untils he had no choice but to go out.

Which happened almost a week later. Candice finally dragged herself out of bed. She showered, threw on some comfortable winter clothes- includding a baggy sweater and a puffy coat- tossed her hair up into a messy bun and headed out to Diagon Alley. Candice needed to get some food for her owl, and decided that she would pick up some applications while she was in town. She was going to have to find another job eventually... better sooner than later, she supposed, not that she was incredibly thrilled about the career change. At her age she shouldn't be getting fired and having to find something to do.

She had stopped to get a cup of hot chocolate after picking up the food for her owl, and was now standing in the street inspecting a store window. There was a help wanted sign in it. But it was a place that sold wizarding fashion. Candice looked down at her current ensemble, then back at the window. Candy was a lot of things, but fashionable was certainly not one of them. She sipped her hot chocolate, wondering if there was even a point in attempting to apply at a place like that. Candice didn't really have the kind of outfits you were in a regular job. She wore nice robes to work at the ministry, but they weren't fashionable for even really flattering. They were functional.

Candice saw a girl working in there. She looked the same age as a Hogwarts graduate. "Really, is entry level stuff what you're looking for?" she asked herself quietly. It wasn't. But she had to have something. Candy supposed she could look into something at Mungo's. She was medically trained, after all. No point in wasting all of that training. But her heart just wasn't in it anymore. She had her reality twisted after this situation, and her faith in helping others had... faltered a little. She slurped her hot chocolate again,

She glanced at her watch. It was almost six... Dinner time. Food had been her best friend for the last week, but she hadn't really gone out. Something hot, and salty, and bad for her would be the perfect thing... "Shush," she said, peering down at her stomach while it growled. Yes, dinner. "Where to go for dinner," she muttered, turning away from the window to peer down Diagon Alley.

If there was a word for Dolly in that moment it was fresh and bouncy - which was actually two words but it didn’t much matter. She felt good for the first time since coming home probably. Press for the book was going surprisingly well, she had a string of men to juggle which meant she never got bored, and all of the weight she had put on over the Holidays was gone - not that she had but on a lot but it was enough to make her do a double take in the mirror and someone to make an off hand comment about the size of her bottom. It was the sort of early evening she didn’t have often - there was nothing on the docket for that night which meant she was all on her own. She’d given Tabitha the night to do with herself what she wanted. If you were going to break in a new assistant it was important that you not give them alcohol poisoning in the first two weeks of a job.

She was wandering through Diagon, thinking of taking a peep at one of the robe shops - she was thinking of a pick me up present for Gabby really, when she literally bumped into a lovely blonde witch. Dolly did a double take, though she wasn’t made up in the least there was a natural flawlessness to her complextion. Her large brown eyes were lined with lovely lashes  - though they seemed despondent. One could not be certain as her clothes hid most of her - but Dolly was a betting woman and could place galleons on the blonde having amazing curves under all those unflattering layers. She was mildly taken aback, though not sure why. It was not uncommon for her to notice pretty women, she had an artistic eye for the female form - but it was rare to see someone hiding what was sure to be a bright light under such a depressing bushel.

:”So sorry Love!” her hand rested against the other woman’s shoulder, “I swear I walk into walls more often than not,” well that was true, she didn’t add that usually she was three sheets to the wind. Giving the blonde a dazzling smile she looked toward the shop window, “Oh lovely, we’re still freezing our bollocks off and they’re bringing out the new spring line,” shaking her head she moved for the door, “Come on then, it’s bloody wicked out here. Pencil skirts, while attractive do not offer much protection from the elements,” she wrinkled her nose again, holding the door open for the stranger - never considering she might have had other plans and not intended to shop at all. Dolly felt it was a bit of a fashion emergency. One should not owe sweats, let alone leave the house in them.

Candice let out a loud, surprised sound when the other woman bumped into her- and gave her an awkward smile whenever she put a hand on her shoulder. "No worries," she responded. "It's alright- I was just standing in the way, that's all." She really had been. Candy needed to learn to get out of the walkway when she was thinking...

She noticed that this other woman looked familiar. Her attention was soon called to the pencil skirt that didn't help save her from the cold. Candice couldn't imagine not layering up for the winter. She wore a lot of layers in the cold months- she often wore layers in the warmer, months to. Candice inspected her closely- trying to figure out where she knew her from. But her attention was soon diverted from that task when this woman tugged on the door.

She had not intended to go inside, but when the door was held open, and she was being ushered inside, Candice just went inside. "I wasn't coming to shop," she stated. "I was just... looking at the sign, on the window." It was embarassing to admit that. Candice hadn't really talked much about her job or getting fired. "I'm looking for a new job," she said quietly, peering down at her feet. "I got fired last week- and I've got to find something, anything really." Candice blushed at the confession, peeking up at Dolly bashfully. "But I suppose that's just... how things happen, sometimes."

"I should really be on my way," she said to Dolly. "I've got to finish a few more errands and I need to make sure I don't miss any signs... I was reading that one, but this just doesn't seem the right place for me, does it? No, I'm not a fashionista. Not hardly..." Candy trailed off, taking a look at the clothes in the shop. It did, however, look like a good place for this woman to shop.

If there was one thing that broke Dolly’s heart it was a woman who lacked complete and total confidence in herself. She actually saw it far more than she would like at her book signings. It was sad really, the women that lived vicariously through her life instead of seizing their own lives and creating adventure for themselves. It was a catch twenty-two really, women who were out living there lives to the fullest probably wouldn’t have had the time or inclination to read her books. She was also unfamiliar with this brand of allowing one’s self to be pushed from place to place. Dolly’s first and favorite word had been “NO”. She said no to everyone, including her mum and dad. From a young age if she didn’t want to do something ro go somewhere it would come down to a physical battle of wills. The only person who had ever been able to turn her into absolute putty was Dominik and even that hold was waning. She liked to convince herself she might be able to tell him to sod off.

She looked the blonde over curiously, her sharing nature both refreshing and befuddling. It was as though she were drifting through a dream and just randomly spouting ideas. As someone who was calculated even in her unpredictability it was strange to Dolly. Clearing her throat she tilted her head to one side, “Well then I suppose you met me at the most ideal time” extending her hand she gave Candice a brilliant smile, “Dolly St. James, life coach and fashion guru, let find you something appropriately fabulous for interviews. First impressions can make or break the tone of a conversation,” thumbing through a rack of robes she tilted her head to one side, “You’ve got an amazing skin tone, you should really utilize it, and your shape,” she paused looking over her shoulder at Candy, “a woman with curves has a very powerful tool on her person at all times”. It was true, there were some people that would call it a sexist but Dolly was a realist.

Men and women were created equal but not the same and there was a reason for that. Women were meant to be soft and round, to bare children, to nurture - men were built to be protectors, hunters. Women furthered the species and men provided for it. It would never be a completely level playing field, women would never make as much as men for trying to do the same job. It was important to keep the aces up your sleeve where you had them. Did Dolly use her body and feminine wiles to get what she wanted? Ab-so-freaking-lutely! She wasn’t going to stop someone from giving her what she wanted if all it cost her was a little higher hemline and lower neckline, this was the wisdom she wanted to impart to other women who hid themselves under layers of fabric. She was a firm believer if it was comfortable enough you could sleep in it then it was too comfortable to be seen in public, “So what kind of work are you thinking of doing? I mean sales associate isn’t exactly a career choice”.

Candice took the hand extended to her. Dolly St. James was not the name of a life coach- she knew that name, because one of her little guilty pleasures was the book series that the woman wrote. "I don't meant o be rude, Miss St. James, but I don't believe that I need a life coach. Up until recently I was the psychiatrist for the Ministry of Magic- I am well aware of the way I ought to live my life and the importance of a first impression." But it had been a very long time since Candy had to make any sort of first impression on anyone.

But now the woman was talking about skin tones, and her shape and pawing at the racks as though she was going to try to help her find something to wear. Candice blushed at the insinuation that curves were a powerful tool. The only power her curves had was to give incredibly ammunition to those immature enough to pick on her for being a little over weight. "I don't try to show off my body," Candy told her quietly, tugging at her sweater. "I mean, I don't think that people who are bigger ought to show off too much. I think it is very unattractive when someone who is larger wears clothes that are too tight. Some people just weren't given the sorts of curves that you show off- like the sorts of curves you have." No, Candice would feel incredibly awkward and exposed if she tried to show too much skin- and people would whisper, talk, and pick on her. They did that enough without her giving them further reason.

"Well, no, it's not a career choice. But I mean, a lady can't be without a job. I do have bills to pay, and I can't just go on without a job. Beggars can't be choosers, after all. I've checked the prophet- there isn't much available right now." There was one job she was interested in, though. She had seen an ad about a restaurant needing some chefs, but Candice had immediately dismissed the idea. She was a good cook, but she was not a professional chef- and if she applied for that job and was interviewed, Candy was certain that she would make a complete ass of herself.

"I was just going to see exactly what was available, I guess," Candy told her. "Get some ideas of where to start. I've spent a week not doing anything about it- and I can't just keep not doing something about it. It's just difficult," Candice confessed, "to be twenty-seven years old and be booted out of the career you chose, only to realize that being booted from it was a good thing. I wasn't very happy at the ministry. Most of the people I worked with were horrid- they were quite mean to me, and thought of me as useless and incompetent. I didn't have many friends there." Except for Kurby, Dante, and maybe one or two others... But most of the time people who were nice to her didn't really constitute her friends. And the only reason she was even friends with Kurby was because she was so close with his little sister. And as for Dante... well... she had been ignoring him since she was fired. She wasn't sure why, but she just felt like she couldn't face him. "So I think, all in all, it's a positive change. As soon as I figure out where to go next."

Dolly listened half way, filtering the buzzing sort of annoyance that was building at the other woman’s resistance and self pity. She hated when people felt sorry for themselves. She also hated excuses for why a woman would hide herself under layers and layers of unattractive robes. There was a reason it was called selfesteem. It was esteem you gave your own damn self, if you weren’t going to how was anyone else? Turning to look at Candy she placed a hand on her hip, the other resting on the rack, lips pursed to one side, “Trust me Darling, you need a life coach if you’ve spent the last week huddled in bed hiding from reality. What you were before now hardly matters half as much as who you’re being right now - and who you’re being seems terribly lost and just a little bit too critical of herself,” Dolly was unapologetic in her assessment. She was, for the most part, that friend who would point out your skirt was tucked in your panties and you had spinach in your teeth. She expected people to treat her the same way.

“There is a very big difference between appreciating your body and dressing like a tramp,” she took Candy by the hand and tugged her toward a full length mirror, ignoring any protest the blonde could have made. “Now then,” she paused, pushing Candy in front of her peering over the other woman’s shoulder, “This…ensemble you’ve decided to leave the house in…” she paused shaking her head a little as she gathered the excess material of the oversized sweater and tugged it in a bit, giving it more definition, “when you look in the mirror you should be the first person who is able to tell you have breasts and hips - and you should appreciate the fact that you have them. There are poor tiny women all over the world using magic charms to enhance what you have naturally.” placing her hands on either side of Candy’s hips she tugged at the material some more, looking thoughtful.

It had been a long time, a very long time actually, since she had felt the need to take someone under her wing, “You have to treat and talk about yourself like you’re the most amazing person in existence because you’re going to be your only number one fan. If you don’t love yourself how the devil can anyone else?” she sounded vaguely amused, “If you want anyone to take you seriously as a prospective hire you have to convince them you’re the only person who can do the job. How can you convince them you’re capable if you’re shlubbing around in clothes at least two sizes too big? It send the message that you don’t care enough about yourself to know what makes you look amazing - and if you don’t care about you why would anyone else?” it was a genuine question she was posting as her blue eyes caught Cadny’s in the mirror.

Candy bristled. "i have not been hiding from anything. It is perfectly normal to need time to adjust to a large life change. Besides, I have too many family responsibilities to truly hide from reality." Not exactly true, but who was this woman to try and give her a reality check? "And there is nothing wrong with being realistic. I am very self aware- that is not the same as being overly critical." She crossed her arms, resisting when Dolly tried to drag her toward a mirror, and making a loud sound of protest as she pulled the material tighter around her body.

"Don't do that," Candice hissed. What was she doing? Pulling it tight like that it just... she didn't like it. "You're making a scene," Candy told her. But St. James didn't stop- instead she tugged some more and inspected what was in the mirror, talking about her breasts and hips. She knew that Dolly had a point- a lot of women were taking enhancements. "Well, they certainly aren't enhancing their middles," she stated, tugging the material away from the woman to let it hang around her stomach again. "No woman wants the waist size I've got, I can assure you of that- whether they want hips or breasts or not."

The words that she was hearing were a lot like the words Candice had said to others in the past. She wasn't very good at taking her own advice, or the advice of others sometimes for that matter. "I do love myself!" she stated. "I have plenty of amazing qualities. Just because I don't have the best physical appearance doesn't mean I don't like myself. I'm nice, I can cook well, I take care of my family, and I'm a good friend. And lots of other great things. And I don't think that I'm entirely ugly, I just don't think of myself as being gorgeous either. I'm simply average. On a scale of one to ten, I'd probably peg myself between a four and a six. That's not too bad. It could certainly be worse."

But Candy did wish that she was a seven or an eight. Perhaps, at that point, guys would recognize her. Maybe Declan would have thought she was pretty, and it wouldn't have been such an unrequited crush for so long. And maybe... No, that was silly. "And my clothes are not two sizes too big." They were, though, and Candy's expression told Dolly that she knew that. "I'm just not fashionable- not everyone is a fashionista. I don't know the first thing about how to dress to flatter a figure as non existent as mine." In Hogwarts, that might have been true. Her weight at that point had been less womanly- she had just been a fat teenager. Now that she had grown up, though, Candice had filled out to give herself the look of a woman. But Candy just didn't see it that way. She still thought of herself as that awkward Hufflepuff girl that everyone liked to make fun of.

"Besides, I'm certain that you have better things to do than try to give a dumpy old witch lessons on fashion," Candice stated. "You're surely a very busy woman. Book releases, parties, business meetings and what not. I'd truly hate to keep you from anything. I'm not as much of an emergency as you seem to think that I am. I'll find another job soon enough, and things will go back to how they've always been." But how things had always been had always been a bit... Well, it had been less than savory. Candice had always wanted her life to be more exciting. But she just wasn't the sort to have that life. Candice wasn't made to be popular- she was made to help people, and everyone knew that helpers were looked over and ignored. She had grown accustomed to that fact.

Dolly was getting annoyed, “Really? Because from what I see and hear you don’t like yourself much at all.” her tone was growing bored as she put her hands on Candice’s shoulders and made her face the mirror, “Look at yourself, you’re putting down such a pretty package,” she lightly touched the other woman’s blonde hair, tilting her chin to a more haughty angle, “Creamy skin, big blue eyes, coloring that most people would kill for - not a blemish to be seen. If you’d fix your posture a lot of the pooch you think you have would go away,” tilting her head to one side she sighed a little, “and frankly, my dear, wearing baggy clothes makes you look bigger than you are, that sweater adds weight to the least flattering part of yourself, you need lighter material that hugs through here,” she paused gesturing to Candy’s bust line before continuing, “and then floats away from the body a bit”.

It was depressing when women sold themselves short because they didn’t fit some mold created by Veela Vixens. Dolly’s own weight changed often, she was not rail thin, certain parts of her body held more cushion than muscle - but she was happy with herself - and that in turn made her content with her sexuality, which made her sexy. Dolly had to be ok with her body simply because it developed so early - and people did poke fun, but Dolly accepted early the people who talked about her were either jealous because they didn’t have what she did or couldn’t get what they wanted from her. Her skin was thick, and she thought most women needed a bit of toughing up. There was nothing worse than a self loathing woman trying to disguise herself as well adjusted and accepting of herself.

“If you don’t think you’re a ten how in bloody hell will anyone else?” she sounded amused her hands resting on Candy’s hips, “You have to look out for and take care of you - because frankly no one else will. And selling yourself short - saying you’re a six and trying to convince yourself you’re happy with that is complete bollocks. You’re not happy with it, you can’t stand it - or you’d be able to look at yourself in the mirror.” she was being frank now, her no nonsense tone just loud enough for the other woman to hear, “I think you need my help in the worst way - and whether you want it or not you’re going to get it. I have some pretty profound connections in the upper echelon, you listen to me I could have you another job inside of a week, tops”.

"I don't mind if people don't think that I am a ten," Candy told her. "You, you're a ten. You're one of the most gorgeous women in the wizarding world! Everybody knows who you are, and every man probably wants you and most women want to be just like you. Those are some big shoes to fill, and I do not feel like I am up to that. I'd rather be a little lower on the scale. Less problems to deal with, I would think."

She did inspect herself in the mirror though, taking Dolly's suggestions and comments into consideration. "I suppose you're right, though. It wouldn't hurt to get some better clothes... I just don't really know how to shop, I guess. I feel self conscious in anything tight. I feel like it makes me look bigger. You know those big women, who walk around wearing stuff that is obviously too small- everyone makes fun of them for it. I just don't want to be that girl, that's all. I don't know how to get something that fits without being that girl."

"When I was younger, I used to go out a lot," Candy told her. "I'd wear cute things, but I was younger and thinner then. There was a point in time when I was proud of my curves." Then her ex fiancee happened, and she had lost interest in trying to attract men. Candice would admit she was happier when she was more confident, but she did not want to get into that too deeply with a stranger.

But if this woman wanted to help her find another job, then who was she to argue? "But why would you want to help me?" Candice ventured. People never offered her help- she was the one who helped everybody else. "I mean, I'd love to find another job. And any help I could get would be amazing... I just have to wonder what's in it for you is all. It's not often a complete stranger bestows kindness on another for no reason at all. At least not at my age."

Dolly sighed a little and shook her head, “Smoke and mirrors Darling, smoke and mirrors. Come, look,” she paused, extending her hands, showing her plump little fingers, they were short for sure and rather stubby. Then she leaned over and took and tilted her head a certain way in the mirror, under the harsher light there were laugh lines around her eyes - otherwise well concealed, and she used a stubby finger to indicate the small cleft in her chin, “There are plenty of things I could name about myself that I cannot stand, I could even show you the extra meat I have on my hips and tummy and bemoan their existence - but I don’t and you want to know why?” She didn’t wait for the other woman to answer before pressing forward, “Because I love those things about me, I’m not a ten because I’m perfect and men don’t want me because I’m perfect,” she put an arm around Candy in an overly familiar - but hopefully comforting gesture, “They want me because I want me. I’m happy with myself flaws and all”.

She rested her chin on Candy’s shoulder and gave her a little squeeze, “I let myself be jerked around once, to be made to feel like I wasn’t enough. I still had men telling me I was gorgeous and amazing - but I didn’t want me. I hated every inch of myself because this one person, this person that I loved more than reason, didn’t want me,” she was being more honest with a complete stranger than she had been with her closest friends in years. “One day I woke up and I was sick of it. I was sick of feeling bad, I was sick of not wanting to look myself in the mirror and in that moment I chose me - over everyone else in my life. I chose to enjoy the assets and the flaws and to hell with anyone else who didn’t agree”. Well that was the short version. The long version involved waking up in an opium den in Turkey.

Dolly held up her hands with a laugh at Candice’s questions, “Left over Christmas Spirit maybe?” She looked at the other woman in the mirror and gave her reflection a genuine smile, “Honestly? Whatever people may say about me I do not actually eat the hearts of baby Unicorns. And I don’t just use my fame to get on every guest list to every club in the greater UK. I want women to embrace who they are, what they have, to feel good about being a woman and the innate power we possess. What kind of Witches Liberation leader would I be if I saw a Witchling sister drowning in despair and did not offer my expert services?” smoothing the front of her skirt she patted her hair, “A bad one, that’s what. Since you’re so adverse to shopping, why don’t you come by my flat and we’ll work something out then?”

Candice doubted it had anything to do with self confidence. Men wanted women because they actually were beautiful, not because they thought that they were beautiful. She listened as Dolly described a situation with a man she loved. It sounded familiar. Her relationship with Bradley had been similar. She had loved him more than reason, and had believed that they would get married and have their happily ever after. Candy frowned as she thought on it. She remembered putting him above everything else, too. Candice also remembered coming home to the other women in her house, and how it had broken her heart time and again. But she had always believed him when he said he was sorry, when he said he didn't mean it, when he told her that she couldn't do any better than him.

But it was something that Candice didn't talk about. She didn't acknowledge that he was the reason she didn't date, and the reason for her destroyed self esteem. Candice had been so depressed when they broke up that she had gained twenty or thirty pounds, and had never taken it off. Instead she hid her self loathing behind baggy sweaters and a sunshine attitude and the guise of helping others. She had never chosen herself, though. Candice had never put herself first. It had been her family, her friends, her clients, her job, and it had once been Bradley. Now there was nobody left to put first.

She sniffed loudly, and took a loud, deep breath, trying to maintain her self control. The last thing that Candice intended to do was cry in the middle of a shop in Diagon Alley because a stranger had touched a nerve. "I've never invested in myself," Candice told her quietly, refusing to look at herself in the mirror, instead focusing on tearing away her nails. It was true. "I... I've always envied those girls who had confidence, who loved themselves. When I worked at the ministry I saw these strong women- women who refused to let anybody take advantage of them, because they knew what they wanted out of life. But while I was there, I never got to be that woman. People were so... cruel. I thought, as adults, people wouldn't treat me the way. I thought that they grew out of picking on the fat girl." Candy wrapped her arms around herself, and inhaled sharply.

"I think that would be best," she responded to the invitation to come to Dolly's flat. "I just can't do this right now. I'm sorry I just... I have stuff to do, I need to go home." Candy reached out to grasp Dolly's hand, squeezing it tightly. "Thank you for... noticing." Caring didn't seem the right. But noticing did. Nobody had ever stopped to worry about her before. It was weird and awkward.  "I'm Candice Stevenson, by the way," she added. "I'll... I'll owl you." Candy knew that if the woman was serious about friendship and helping her, that she was going to have to take the next step forward. Candice gave her a genuinely thankful smile before stepping around her, leaving the shop to head back home.... And wallow in self misery for a while longer.