[letter regarding the knickers found in this thread]

[Package consisting of offending knickers and two letters]

Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Elliot St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

Daddy St. James,

Please make sure these get back to Eleanor, I'm sure she has been missing them.

Sincerely, George Carter

[In a sealed envelope inside the package, a letter for Ellie]


Smelly Ellie,

Someone came across these the other day, and I realized you might want them back. Even if they won’t fit. Hope you’re having a splendid time doing… nothing whatever it is you do.

Love Always, George

Ellie St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

George Carter
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Nearly Nineteen And Still in Hogwarts,

Wow, I don't even remember those. Are you sure they're mine? Ah, well, the rubbish bin. I have better things to wear (and better people to remember) now.

I'll send you a postcard from the real world.

Keep studying, you'll get there eventually.

Eventually.

Worst Wishes,
E. St. James

PS- Mr. St. James was neither amused nor angry with his youngest daughter. He's always had a soft spot for her. Consequently, he would like your head on a plate. Stay low, we hear there's a hit with your name on it.

George Carter
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Eleanor St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

Head in the Clouds,

When you reach the real world, I’d love a postcard. If you even know how to get a real job. Maybe one day you’ll get off your daddy’s lap? I’ll keep my fingers crossed.

I love it at Hogwarts. If I could stay here another year and still have as much fun, I would. Don’t be jealous just because you couldn’t stick it out.

As for Mr. St. James, you should let him know you all ready had my head on a plate. And from what I recall, you found it rather tasty.

Fondly not thinking of you,
George

Ellie St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

George JACOB Carter
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Special,

I’ve been off Daddy’s lap for fifteen years, but you’ll always be at his knees. For better or worse, Munchkin.

Like I said, I’ll send you a postcard sometime. Currently, I’m far too busy building my portfolio and making plans with my friends and family.

I’m not jealous of living in a dorm and being told when to go to bed. There must be something wrong with me!

Although, to your credit, I heard you’re a book worm now? Congrats... Maybe you’ll actually pass a NEWT or two.

Don’t flatter yourself. You’re not the least bit edible.

Outside the Snow Globe,
Ellie

George Jacob Carter The Awesome
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Elephant St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

Chipmunk,

If your dad’s part Giant, then I don’t think he’s your dad… sorry to break it to you.

Basically: you’re far too busy doing nothing but working off your allowance and keeping your room clean? Odd… it sounds like you’re still at Hogwarts, minus a class schedule. But hold your head high, cupcake.

I heard I’m doing with a bookworm, if that’s the same as being one. If I pass a NEWT, I’ll be sure to show it off. Post it on the fridge for all to see.

Edible and delicious, if I recall your old inclination correctly. And judging by the photos you gave me…

Don’t Be Jealous,
George

Ellie St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

Carter
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Douchebag,

Stop owling me. My window is staying closed, and the next time your bird assaults it, I'm sending back a howler.

Don't Be Hilarious,
Ellie

Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Eleanor St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

3 May 2009

Eleanor,

Why did I break up with you again?

Love me forever, George

Ellie St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

George Carter
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

George,

...

Are you serious?

Ellie

P.S. Your trousers had too many helping hands.

P.P.S. I ditched you.

Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Eleanor St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

Chippy,

Would you have forgiven me?

George

P.S. I dropped you.

Ellie St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

George Carter
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

George,

Not a chance. I didn't forgive you.

Or are theorizing about another life on another planet?

Ellie

P.S. You wish.

Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Eleanor St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

Chippy,

I know you didn’t. I’m saying would you have. Merlin you need to learn to read.

And if not… why not?

George

P.S. No, you wish

Ellie St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

George Carter
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

George,

CAN YOU READ?

Obviously I would not have, since

I DID NOT.

I'm way too confident and stable, that's why. Also, I'm not stupid.

But if you're trying to get at what I think you're trying to get at...

If things had been different between us, and if I'd loved the way I felt people should love each other when they're with the right person and they know it, and if I thought you'd loved me in that way, too, then... I don't have an answer for you. I guess you'll have to rely on your gut. (Poor girl.)

Ellie

P.S. But maybe, yeah, given the situation.

P.P.S. Did you muck things up again?

P.P.P.S. I'm not writing a letter to your girlfriend because you don't know how.

Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Eleanor St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

I don’t muck things up!

And if I understand the mess you said… you’re of no use to me.

I don’t have a I’ve never been cheated on. That I cared about, anyway.

Laney would just laugh at me, but I figured I did it to you so you might have some idea of how it feels. And I don’t know how to write… a letter like that. Do I need to write her a letter?

George

Ellie St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

George Carter
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

George,

Why are you writing me, then? I'm confused. How do you expect me to help you if you aren't going to tell me all the pretty details? I don't do the whole Seer thing very often. I'm a little rusty, since I graduated on time and everything.

How do you not care when you're cheated on? That's clearly your first problem.

Don't bring HER name into this. Your dense is showing. Has your mood ever gone to shit when you heard a certain person's name? That's how it feels. But, knowing you, it was probably that one again. Hope you didn't catch anything too painful.

Write her a letter about what, George? You being sorry you cheated, or you explaining that you've never been cheated on and this is all 'new' to you? Did she cheat, then?

Ellie

Hogwarts Castle
Scotland, UK

Eleanor St. James
St. James Residence
Reading, Berkshire, UK

Ellie,

I think that’s the most put together thing you’ve ever written.

I haven’t cared in the past about being cheated on. That’s… what I meant.

But I love this girl. I loved this girl. I actually said it. She was pure and amazing. Up until the moment she decided to ride a different broom… cheat. And no it’s not La-Her.

I wouldn’t have cheated on Wa the girl I was with. At least I like to think I wouldn’t have. It is all new to me… I feel all empty and useless. I don’t feel that way. I figured you might have... some insight.

George

P.S. If this letter ever sees anyone else’s eyes but yours, you’re dragon fodder.