Sometimes it was handy to have a brother who felt the need to share with you all the secrets to getting into his home, just in case of emergencies of course. Archer might have emphasized the point that it was strictly for emergencies a little more if he had hoped to avoid any sort of break-ins on the part of one little brother named Hunter Thomas Radley. Unfortunately for Archer, he had not done this, and as such Hunter had decided that since it was a Friday evening and he had no date and he was particularly bored, that he ought to take advantage of the privileged information.

So it was around three in the afternoon when he made his way into his big brother's apartment, wand in hand. The plan for the afternoon was to build the most epic pillow fort known to man in his brother's living room. Archer generally had a stick in his bum, and Hunter hoped to pull it out. Or at least loosen it a bit by giving him a little taste of his childhood again. All young boys built pillow and blanket forts. Now that he was an adult, Hunter had mastered the art. (Not that he did it on a regular basis in the privacy of his own home, of course not!)

Having the use of a wand, though, made it much easier. A wand could produce pillows, after all, and not only could a wand produce pillows but it could make them stick to each other so that they wouldn't fall down. First thing was first, though. All of the pesky furniture had to be moved out of the way. With the flick of a wand he had everything stacked against the back wall. Then he flicked his wand at the huge blanket he had brought with him to drape it against the black wall and cover everything up.

Then the real work began. He started stacking pillows against the blanket, sticking them together with his wand. Eventually the back wall was covered, and he began doing the side walls. Before long he had the side and front walls complete. He even had little turrets on the front. It was a completely epic fort by any and all standards if he did say so himself. Ducking back inside of it, he used a blanket to make a door. Now safely inside he enchanted a few things to glow and hung them from the top like lights. Then he concocted a few seating areas out of a few more pillows, and then he transfigured some books into a coffee table.

Flicking his wrist over, Hunter peered at his watch. It was a little after six. Good! He had just enough time to head out, grab a couple of pizzas and some beer, and get back right before Archer returned. Hunter hoped a peace offering of food and suds might cool his temper. Archer probably wouldn't be automatically thrilled by the prospects of having an epic fort in his living room.

He returned to the apartment just before it was time for Archer to get home from work. (He'd discovered Archer's patterns by calling randomly on evenings to see when he was home. Yes, Hunter had been planning this for a couple of weeks.) He ducked into the fort, set up the pizza and beer on the coffee table, then flopped down on a huge pillow couch and waited. This was going to be absolutely awesome! Hunter could feel it deep down in his bones!

Archer actually had a passable day at work, dare he say it was even a good day in the office.  First of all, he had been able to witness the glory that was to prank Edward Pratt more than once in one day and get away with it, and everything with Ray seemed to be calming down.  It was like the past two weeks had erased themselves for the most part and Archer was not about to let his mood be killed because of it.

He even let himself leave the office on time that evening, unable to stand being there for another long day.  He also didn’t need to do any extra work, nor did he want to trip himself up, so Archer Radley was headed home at approximately seven PM, according to his dragon-hide leather strapped watch.  After having pleasantly declared himself free for the weekend, Archer left the ministry.  He contemplated going to the cauldron, but after examining the fact that it was almost seven and there was no game on – he wasn’t going to bother. 

Being home for the evening wasn’t going to be so bad, anyway.  With all the extra work piled on, he felt like he hadn’t sat down and enjoyed himself for more than an hour at a time.  If he was blessed to even be at his flat, he was sleeping.  So, he apparated to the building in wizarding London (he had no patience for concealing his lifestyle from muggles), and taking his wand from the holster under his arm, he was about to tap it to the door when he realized that something was off.  Definitely off.  The plain mat in front of the door had been moved, just slightly. 

None of the immediate alarms seemed off – nothing indicated anything had occurred, but the mat was off.  Just in case, Archer kept his wand at the ready, reaching out to push the door open.  He turned the knob and blinked – it was still dark in the flat.  Odd.  He did not need to use his voice to illuminate the end of his wand, putting it through the door first.  He was silent as he stepped through the doorway, greeted immediately by something large and voluminous in his living room. 

Flicking his wand, the lights around went on and Archer was immediately taken aback.  There were pillows and blankets everywhere.  On the apparent door of the thing on the inside of his apartment was a sign declaring, in poorly written print, “NO GURLZ ALLOUD,” complete with backward R and a mad face.  There could only be one person responsible for this – one parasite who knew the way to get around all of the protective spells he used to keep his home free of intruders – he should have known. 

“Hunter Thomas Radley, what the Hell are you doing here?”

He was home! Hunter giggled wildly when he heard his brother come in the door, and wasn't surprised to hear his voice booming through the house, obviously unimpressed with the most awesome fort to have ever been built in the history of man kind. (Well not the most awesome, Hunter had, at one point in time in the last two weeks since he planned this, built one fort that had windows, doors, and separate rooms but he didn't have the time to do that this day.) Hunter was slightly offended that Archer did not ooh and ahh at the creation.

Poking his head out of the door, he pouted quite dramatically in the direction of his oldest brother. "You mean to tell me you aren't the slightest bit impressed by the construction of this pillow fort?" The look on Archer's face told him rather explicitly that no, he was not. If Archer or Joel had broken into his home and built a fort he would be insanely excited about the idea and immediately revert back to being twelve years old. Then again, Hunter often acted like a child instead of acting like a man who was almost thirty years old. Yuck. It sounded awful in his head, saying it out loud would be worse. Never was Hunter going to admit his age in that exact phrasing out loud. Not ever! He was never gonna grow up!

Still, there was this problem of an angry Archer. An angry Archer wasn't a very pretty Archer, either. "Anyone ever tell you that you're downright hideous when you're angry?" Hunter asked.

Ducking back in the fort he grabbed a beer and then held it up outside of the door. "I've got beer," he said. "And pizza." It was true, too! Too bad he had to whip out the peace offering so soon. Hunter had hoped to have a little fun first. "You can have some, if you want. I thought I'd surprise my big brother by bringing him dinner. And I thought that maybe I'd give you something fun to play with all weekend. Y'know how it is, sometimes you get bored and you build forts. And sometimes you get tired of building forts all alone in your living room... So I thought I'd come build a fort in your living room instead and that maybe we could enjoy it together?"

"If you want pizza and beer you really have no choice. You can't have it unless you come inside and eat. You know, eat it in the fort. C'mon, big bro! Pull that stick out of your arse and have a little fun. You know you love me for this. And, in the grand scheme of things, I could have done something much worse to your living room for you to come home to. Like put a swimming pool in the floor or something. This is pretty innocent in comparison to most of my shenanigans." There, speech was concluded. Hunter ducked back into the fort and flopped down on a pillow couch, then cracked open another beer for himself. He had a feeling Archer wouldn't be able to resist coming in. It was an awesome fort after all.

“You’re lucky I think before I act,” Archer stated, a clear dig at his brother who looked rather like a rabbit popping out of his hole.  The fort was rather impressive, upon realizing that it was not someone breaking into his apartment to kill him – no, Hunter probably couldn’t hex himself out of a paper bag, let alone go up against a fully trained and experienced auror.  Though he never actually accepted the title of senior auror, he had been offered the position several times – thought it was just a ridiculous extra title with a tiny badge, nothing that a regular auror couldn’t do – and being the bosses partner was enough for him. 

But, for lack of a real threat and energy to deconstruct the fort or put his furniture back in the right place, Archer Radley had nothing to do but accept what happened to his living room.  Though he did not appear outwardly excited about such a thing, he couldn’t help but remember when they would make forts in Joel and Hunter’s room with their things (Archer, being so much older always had his own room), but he helped construct with the two younger boys and was often named the overseer and chief architect of fort building. 

It appeared his lessons in stability had worn off on his younger brother, or he cheated and used magic – probably the latter.  Even though he said his back was what got hurt – Archer and Joel always suspected his head was part of the damaged portion of Hunter Radley.  Rolling his eyes at his statement about his appearance, Archer sighed.  “Well, not all of us can be likened to a girl,” he said pointedly, looking at his brother – labeled the pretty one. 

He would have had more to say about it had there not been the immediate promise of a cold can of beer held out for him.  This was enough to draw Archer in – more so than his curiosity over how the fort was made on the inside and what was lighting it up.  He swore if there were candles in there and this was a fire hazard he was not going to deal with the landlord on this one.  He wasn’t giving in quite so easily though.  That’s what Hunter wanted and Archer wasn’t about to give that to him without having him work for it.  “You think bribing me is going to make this much better?” he asked in as serious a voice as he could muster – fairly good for the practiced auror. 

He had already really been persuaded, but his brother’s little speech was more than enough to make him cover his mouth – so he could not hear him laughing behind it, and shook his head, bending down to enter through the doorway of the fort.  Thankfully, it was spacious inside and the youngest Radley took into account that both of them had to fit – where did that coffee table come from?  Shrugging his shoulders, Archer plopped onto the floor and took a piece of cheesy, meaty, delicious pizza, biting off the tip. 

Satisfied that it was at least good pizza, Archer cracked open one of the cans.  He leaned back against some of the pillows and raised his eyebrows at his brother. “So, the pull to buy my love and approval with bacon-sausage pizza and beer, destroying my living room, and basking in my presence overwhelmed your desire to kiss arse and pulled you away from Mum’s apron strings?”

"If you were to throw killing spells because someone had erected a fort in your living room, you would be pretty pathetic, and have lots of explaining to do to the ministry." Clearing his throat, Hunter put on his best serious voice and began to mock his brother. "I entered the home and an intruder had constructed some sort dangerous miniature fort in the midst of my living room! Naturally I thought he must be very dangerous if he were able to use pillows to build such an impressive fortress. My initial instinct was to hex him into submission, as a man who knows his way around pillows so well might be quite deadly if he were to attempt to instigate a pillow fight!"

Hunter was accustomed to Archer making jabs at his looks, and Joel too for that matter. He knew the root of it was the fact that they were so incredibly jealous of his pretty boy looks. More girls went for him than the rugged, handsome types. The good looking girls did anyway. In Hunter's opinion he had always brought the prettiest girls home to mum. (Not that Archer was ever bringing girls home to mum anyway, something that broke his dear mother's heart. She wanted grand children, and Hunter was closest to giving them to her.) "I'd rather be likened to a girl than be likened to a mountain troll," he retorted. He really ought to be playing it safe, considering that he had infiltrated his brother's home to make a pillow fort. But what kind of a brother didn't throw a friendly insult back? A bad kind, of course!

"Of course I think bribing you will help!" Hunter called out. "If I had not bribed you, then you would still be yelling at me, now wouldn't you?" He grinned when he finally heard his brother shimmy his way into the fort. Then he plopped down, grabbed a beer and some pizza, and things were okay. Hunter knew that beer and pizza would make it okay. That was how you made peace with a man, after all, was to feed him and give him alcohol. It would definitely work for himself, he knew that. No matter how mad Hunter might be at someone, if they gave him beer and pizza all would be forgotten.

But of course, Archer could not just gracefully accept the pizza and beer like a normal, mature, full grown man would do. He had to poke fun at his little brother. Hunter always was agitated at the way others teased him for sticking so close to home and being so close to their mother. He lived two houses down, and was always visiting with her. Really Hunter's mum was his best friend, and if his mum didn't like a girl, she didn't last long. It meant a lot to Hunter to have his mother's approval in everything that he did. That didn't make him some sap or some immature fool. It just meant he had a good appreciation for his family, and there was nothing wrong with that.

And there was also nothing wrong with being almost thirty and still a tiny bit attached to the apron strings, right? "If you must know," Hunter grumbled, "Mum and Dad have gone out of town for a couple of days. And it wasn't the pull to buy your love so much as the pull to destroy your living room. I tossed all of your furniture," he lied easily, and was surprisingly convincing in his casual commenting. "I thought that this should be a permanent fixture, and as long as you don't have a couch or anything else to put, you'll just have to leave my fort here. So that we can enjoy it always. I thought it was rather genius. I know I would love to have a brother who cared enough to make a permanent pillow fort in my living room. It's great for getting girls," Hunter added.

"They see the sign and get all uppity, and you tell them that they're the only girl allowed in your fort. It's surprisingly effective, even on grown women. Although, I have to admit, it works better on girls who are twenty or twenty-one. They still find the cute in stuff like that." Yes, Hunter liked younger women, and no he was not ashamed of it. Younger women liked him, too. For various reasons. His immaturity was actually appealing to many. Lots of women liked big kids. They thought it would make for a good father. Hunter knew he would be a great dad if he ever got the chance, so maybe they weren't too wrong about that...

"Speaking of girls, Mum wanted me to ask you if you were going to get married any time soon. She says you should have given her grandchildren by now and it is all your fault her house is quiet on the weekends. That you aren't living up to your duty as a song because she doesn't have any babies to babysit for you while you go out and have fun." Their mother hadn't really told Hunter to ask Archer that, but he decided to bring it up anyway, just because it generally made Archer squirm, and it was oh so fun to watch his big brother squirm. "You aren't getting any younger, she told me to remind you, so you better get at it soon."

Rolling his eyes as he was mocked, Archer attempted to pay no attention to it.  He didn’t really care what his brother thought, particularly in relation to his job and how he handled intruders.  “You know, the pillow fort could have been a diversion so that I could have been ambushed or something – I wouldn’t put it past a dark wizard –“ a pause, “or someone stupid enough to break into an auror’s flat.”  It was true, an auror was supposed to have everything secured and locked so they didn’t have to worry about a possible attack at home – he should have known better than to give it to his brother for a different kind of attack entirely.

He wasn’t going to complain too much, he decided, after getting the beer and pizza.  At least Hunter hadn’t skimped out on him.  Perhaps it was just him though, he had never liked cheap things, and this was some good beer and fairly decent pizza, better than what Archer ordered if he were hungry enough to actually go to that length.  Folding the crust and supported the cheese-ridden gooey-ness of the breaded delicacy, Archer took a big bite and sighed.  It was really delicious.  He was fully satisfied and had to take the pizza away from his face as he laughed. 

It was priceless when Hunter had to admit the only reason he was around him was because mum wasn’t around.  He rolled his eyes and leaned back against the wall of the fort, surprised that it was so strong.  He must have used magic on it, which was fairly cool, since he didn’t have to worry about knocking it over, and went to put the pizza back in his mouth.  Of course, he could not possibly take a bite as his eyes widened, looking at him critically as he said he threw away his furniture.  “If you tossed my furniture – your accident is going to look like a playground mishap,” he threatened, but had no reason to believe that he actually had taken that desperate of a turn – and for the whole getting girls thing – Archer let out an audible laugh.

“If it’s so good for getting girls, tell me, where’s your wife and 2.5 kids?” he said curiously.  His brother talked a big game, but really, he was no closer to anything than any of them and if things were going to progress like Archer wanted them to with Ray, there would at least be someone waiting for him at home (figuratively, since they’d probably leave work together, but it was the point of the matter), not that Hunter had to know that.  He was so attached to their mother – like a little spy, that Archer didn’t want to give him anything he could report back to her on that she could write to him about.  Shrugging his shoulders, his brother’s explanation did not faze him, though he couldn’t help but want to keep the fort up for at least a little while.  He’d never say it out loud, but the kid inside him was fairly excited about this venture. 

And finally, Hunter got to the meat of the matter – his not so subtle spying.  “You can tell mum that it’s none of her business – and none of yours either, for that matter.  You’re a son too – you bring her some grandkids if she wants them so badly.”  It was not his typical response, which was to dodge all questions on the matter and ignore everything he had to say, but he was in a far better mood – possibly due to pizza and beer and took a drink from the can before another bite.  It was like the perfect mixture – anyone who disagreed was clearly delusional. 

“What are you? Almost thirty, right?” he raised his eyebrows at him, hoping to get a rise out of him.  “If I’m getting old, you are too, boyo.”