Griffin Grief!
by Thelma Agnes Diddle
1st March - evening edition
LONDON - Several eyewitnesses report a griffin was loose
[1] in the administrative offices of the Ministry of Magic this morning. The creature created chaos and caused significant damage until it could be cornered and curtailed. Miraculously, no casualties were reported.
“I’d only just arrived at work,” described one witness, who wished to remain anonymous, “came out of the lifts and there it was, tearing up the carpet for breakfast!”
Sources suggest that the griffin was sent in the post to the Ministry, trapped in a trunk. Whether the charms failed or the beast broke out in hunger, nobody would confirm, but it is known to have taken several experienced wands to capture it. Some sources even suggested that Edwin Glass, Minister for Magic, lent his wand to the effort.
“Well, he was Head of Magical Accidents for almost a decade,” another witness said, “always been a dab hand in a crisis, Glass, which is why he’s made such an excellent Minister.”
However, there were claims that the Department for Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures were slow to act when the alarm was raised.
“They sent a slip of a boy up, I think he’s only an apprentice!”
The Department is now headed up by Balfour Spectre, who took over in January. His predecessor lasted only nine months before his untimely death at the claws of a direwolf at home.
[2] It is perhaps no surprise then that their wixes were reluctant to face a griffin in their very building.
“If you have a creature you cannot control, then please get in touch with us,” advised a spokeswix from the Beast Division, “and by get in touch we don’t mean send them by owl in a trunk, however good the enchantments are. Send a letter and we’ll visit you. We can help if you have a beast in need, or who has outgrown your space, but the best prevention is not to buy creatures unless you are fully informed of their needs and the dangers. Griffins are unsuitable pets. Our advice and guidance can be found at all good menageries and creature shops.”
[1st March] Griffin Grief!