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[27 Sep] A Right Howler [Kurby]

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[27 Sep] A Right Howler [Kurby]

on April 06, 2018, 03:38:12 PM

The letter is signed in glitter blue ink, with flourish. Although this letter is a skilled forgery, it has not come from the supposed sender - though any responses will be returned to the witch herself.

Recipient:
Kurby Bagnold
DEPARTMENT FOR REGULATION AND CONTROL OF MAGICAL CREATURES
MINISTRY OF MAGIC
LONDON

27/09/2011

Mr Bagnold!

Or may a dear witch call you Kurby?

I was so very dismayed to discover you came in second to Longbottom in our recent poll. I even sent in three hundred entries on your behalf, but alas, our Editor, Queen G is a paid up member of the Bottoms. It was fixed. Don’t tell Neville though. Break his heart.

It is a crime that your chiselled jaw and cold, brooding eyes were robbed of the title. I would have adored to interview you and listen to your velvet voice all afternoon under your smoldering gaze. What could be sexier than a man who wrestles beasts with gnashing teeth, dressed in leather, under the light of the full moon?

I’d wrestle you in the light of the moon. I’m sure I could make you howl.

Owl me quick and tell me where we shall meet. I can't wait to get my paws on you!

Yours,


LIL SNIGGER x x x

Re: [27 Sep] A Right Howler [Kurby]

Reply #1 on April 07, 2018, 12:05:57 AM

Later that day, a return owl carries a letter not to the witch who appears to have sent the original note, but to her direct supervisor.

Kurby Bagnold
Diagon Alley, London

Genevieve Garcia-Gamp
Witch Weekly Headquarters
London

27 September

Gen,

I get it.  Ha ha.

You showed me.

Now please explain why you had to set your goddamned STAR REPORTER on me with this $@*#??  I've already had to put up with this bleeding mess at the Ministry for over a week.  I don't give a centaur's arse what the hell this Snigger thinks about me, and now I've got goddamned glitter ALL OVER MY DESK.

Just leave me the hell alone.  Okay?  You already got what you wanted on Carter, and then you won with your goddamned article too.  I don't know why the hell you feel like you have to keep coming after me.

K.

Re: [27 Sep] A Right Howler [Kurby]

Reply #2 on April 11, 2018, 08:00:51 AM

Genevieve Garcia-Gamp
Witch Weekly Headquarters
London

Kurby Bagnold
Diagon Alley, London

28th September

K (are we only using initials now?),

I promise that Lil Snigger wasn’t my doing. Why would I let anyone else have fun with you?

When you’re ready to stop sulking, owl me.

G
xXx
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