“Annie! How delightful you came sweetheart!” The words trilled loudly from the peroxide blonde stood at the door. Her rouged lips were spread widely in a grin, baring unnaturally white teeth as bright blue eyes fell on the couple stood on the doorstep. Within mere seconds she pounced. Her arms reached out to envelope her daughter into a tight, uncomfortable hug. They pulled the shorter witch close, leaving ‘Annie’ stood stock still, awkward and unmoving until the hell ceased and Cindy[1] Bombay took a step back, this time allowing her bright eyed gaze to settle on her daughter’s guest.

“And you brought a boy!” Cindy chirped excitedly, performing a similar action on her daughter’s guest, wrapping her arms around him, reaching up on her tiptoes and placing a huge red lipped kiss upon the german wizard’s cheek.

Hannah Bombay positively cringed, her brown eyed gaze looking up to see the lipstick mark left on Johann’s cheek by a practically estranged parent.
“Mother…” she tried to begin but was interrupted as Cindy reached up to Johann, grabbing his cheek and giving it a good, motherly squeeze.

“Our little Annie isn’t a lesbian, Freddie!” The loud witch squawked, looking back into the house. “She’s got a boyfriend! And he isn’t dead or bleeding!”

Hannah visibly stiffened, breathing in slowly to stop herself from snapping at her mother for such comments or turning on her heel and leaving as fast as she could.

Cindy finally left Johann’s cheek alone and began to wave them into the house. “Come come! Daddy’s in the kitchen. He’s so excited to see you, Annie!” And with that, the blonde witch skipped into the house leaving Hannah stood on the doorstep looking very reluctant to enter the house.

“Never call me Annie.”

1.	Hannah's Parents

Annie?

Johann was puzzled. Then again, that wasn't too much of an unusual situation given the circumstances. He was about to meet Hannah Bombay's parents. This way pay-back, a favour owed from all the trouble of the past few months. Hannah had experienced a rough time with the Ministry for her transformation with Knox Greyfriar away from a Ministry holding cell. Then there'd been the falling out when Johann had explained his father believed Hannah to be his partner, but on discovery Hannah was a werewolf, Wolfgang had chosen to insult her very publicly in Gringotts. Johann had been the unfortunate party to split it up before Hannah had felt the need to gouge out his father's eyes.

"And you brought a boy!"

Well, it had been a while since he'd been called a 'boy'. Johann was surprised but went along with the hug, not sure if Hannah's parents were like her in secret, and this was a strange, rather affectionate front. Oh Merlin, did she just kiss him? Did she just squeeze his cheek? That was remarkably familiar of her. Johann was fast calculating the probability that this woman was not a blood relation to Hannah.

"Hello!" Johann greeted brightly, yet his voice wavered slightly with the nerves.

“Our little Annie isn’t a lesbian, Freddie! She’s got a boyfriend! And he isn’t dead or bleeding!” Johann swallowed a laugh, biting his bottom lip and clearing his throat to cover it. He wanted to survive Christmas day a little longer, it was possible.

“Come come! Daddy’s in the kitchen. He’s so excited to see you, Annie!” With that she vanished into the house. Johann gave Hannah a look of amusement, but found her to be looking livid already, which didn't bode well at all for the rest of the day.

“Never call me Annie.” Johann figured this was for his benefit and held up both hands in surrender,
"I wouldn't even think of it, An-." It was impossible to suppress the grin.

"You'll have to let me know why some time.. shall we?" Johann gestured to the front door which remained open to them. "Don't keep your Father waiting." He added, still smiling, but this time a little more sweetly. "He's got to meet your 'boyfriend' too."

With a little sigh, having agreed to play the part for the day (after all, it wasn't as if they hadn't accidentally given the impression at other times) Johann followed Hannah into the Bombay house, his eyes wandering left and right at the doorways and rooms, and the Christmas decorations.

"Thank you for the invitation," Johann called to Hannah's mother as they made their way inside, "So lovely to meet you both at last." That was polite, wasn't it?
"Johann by the way, but I'll answer to boyfriend-not-dead-or-bleeding if that's the norm?"

"I wouldn't even think of it, An-."

Hannah’s head shot around to give Johann a dangerous stare.  It was bad enough her parents felt the need to give the young healer a nickname, having friends think it was acceptable was too much to bear. Her name the Hannah. Hannah. H-A-N-N-A-H. Not Han. Not Anna. Certainly not Annie. It would be liked her calling Johann JoJo. It would never happen. It should never happen.

But Storm looked like he was going to enjoy this far too much as he suggested they finally go inside. It was probably a bad idea to bring him. But he could stop her from hexing her parents when they got too much and her irritation got the better of her. And he’d stop the letters telling her to cease running around with wolves and embarrassing them and find a husband instead. Her mother truly was a simple minded idiot.

They entered the kitchen as Johann introduced himself in a way only Johann could. At the kitchen table stood Fred Bombay, greyer than last time she’d seen him yet smiley as ever. Hannah’s feelings towards her father still remained complicated but she offered him a small smile as he looked up to her.

From next to Fred the witch laughed, grabbing her husband’s arm as she threw her head back in an over the top action. “Oh aren’t you funny, Your Ham!” She squealed, abandoning her quieter husband and moving closer to Johann and her daughter. “What an exotic name, Annie, dear. Shame on you for hiding this one!” Her thin arm snaked around Johann’s and against Hannah’s better judgement, she let her mother pull him away.

“Little Annie spends too much time with the deceased, Your Ham. She doesn’t get out much and we were worried for her. She’s a bit awkward as you probably know. But aren’t you marvellous! And handsome too!” For a second time the woman grasped Johann’s cheek and gave him a big smooch. Pulling away, she patted his cheek. “Now, a tall boy like you needs a good drink. Firewhiskey, wine, beer? I’m afraid we don’t have anything from Denmark.”

“Mum… back off. Let him breathe.” Hannah tried reprimanding her mother, staring at the dim witch as she accosted her friend. But now Frederick was moving in. The olive skinned man walked over, squeezing his daughter’s shoulder before eyeing Storm suspiciously.

“You look quite a bit older than my daughter. You better not be the cause of all this trouble she’s been getting into with the ministry, boy.”

“Dad!”

Well, there was making one feel at home, and … making one feel at home. Hannah's mother seemed to take the opportunity to make grand gestures of amusement and laugh a lot. Johann was definitely considering bringing that relationship elixir down here in the future to verify this woman was a relation of Hannah's. If it wasn't for the mild biological similarities, he'd be absolutely sure.

“Little Annie spends too much time with the deceased, Your Ham. She doesn’t get out much and we were worried for her. She’s a bit awkward as you probably know. But aren’t you marvellous! And handsome too!”
"Why, er… thank you." Johann was momentarily flustered with all the physical contact and kissing.
“Now, a tall boy like you needs a good drink. Firewhiskey, wine, beer? I’m afraid we don’t have anything from Denmark.”
“Mum… back off. Let him breathe.”

"Something against Denmark?" Johann asked as Hannah reprimanded her mother, so it was somewhat lost, "They do alright beer, but all the wine is produced in magical greenhouses due to the climate. I'll erm, have what everyone else is drinking, please don't go to any trouble."

Johann didn't clock Hannah's father approaching him until he was there, and visibly jumped a fraction as he locked eyes. Whereas Hannah's mother had been all affection, Hannah's father was definitely where she got her familiar ways.
“You look quite a bit older than my daughter. You better not be the cause of all this trouble she’s been getting into with the ministry, boy.”
“Dad!”

"Oh, no, I'm not getting her into trouble, Sir, I just work there, and I'm thirty three." He extended his hand cautiously to shake, "Johann Storm, I'm with International Magical Co-operation. Met Hannah when she worked with Magical Law Enforcement on level 2. She's rather good at dead bodies, if you ask me." He politely emphasised how to say his name correctly, wondering if he might have to resort to suggesting Hannah's mother use Gabrielle's nickname of Joh so he was not forced to being referred to as pork all afternoon.

"Good to meet you at last." He repeated for good measure, maintaining steady eye contact with Frederick. Then looking to Hannah (in mild desperation to avoid her mother returning to squeeze his cheek again) asked,
"What would you like to drink.." The name Annie almost jumped out of his mouth but he found himself stiffly considering options, and ended up with, "… darling?" Owch.

As Cindy Bombay fussed around the kitchen trying to decide on a suitable drink for her daughter’s future husband and Hannah Bombay reluctantly began to untie her cloak, Frederick Bombay continued to stare at Johann carefully. It took several moments before the wizard finally smiled and warmly shook Johann’s hand.

“Oh don’t you bother with calling him Sir, Your Ham! Daddy will do! You’re practically family now!” Cynthia squawked from the stove.

“That’s my daughter, Johann,” Mr Bombay began to respond, ignoring his wife and instead flashing a glance in Hannah’s direction. “always preferring to spend time with the deceased or injured than her own family.” He pulled his hand away, wiping it on his robes out of habit. Like father like daughter.

The youngest Bombay visibly cringed at being called ‘darling’. That was worse than ‘Annie’! So as she removed her cloak from her shoulders, she looked up to Storm.
“Joey, let me take your cloak. Please, indulge my parents; look like you plan to remain here for a while. I’m surprised my mother’s not ripped it off you already.” The dig at Cindy didn’t go unnoticed and there was a loud clatter of pots before Cynthia turned to the couple near the entrance to the kitchen.

“What was that Hannah?” The high pitched witch demanded, her blue eyes squinting across the kitchen at the healer.

“Johann? Cloak.”

“You’re not too old to be sent to your room, young lady! Fred? Did you hear her?”

“In fact leave it on, come on. I have some steak in the fridge at home.”

“Steak! That’s all you’re eating now you’ve turned into a monster, isn’t it?”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me Hannah Bombay! And we had to find out from the neighbour! Do you have any idea how embarrassing that was for us?”

“Embarrassing? For you?”

“Exactly! And then we look in the paper to find you’re a criminal! As well as a w-w-wer-”

Now Hannah looked furious. She stood stock still, grasping the cloak a lot tighter between her fingers than was necessary.
“Say it. The ‘w’ word.”

Frederick raised his hands to stop the conflict. “Cindy! Leave it! She’s here. Our baby girl’s here for Christmas and she’s brought her fiancé with her. Let’s just enjoy Christmas!  Fire whiskey good for you Johann? It’s delightfully strong.” And Mr Bombay wasted no time in rushing to the sideboard to procure the bottle.

Well that escalated rather quickly. Johann found himself comparing his relations with his parents to be much the same as Hannahs - only she was putting in a Christmas appearance, he was not.

"Firewhiskey, yes - sounds..." The words drifted out of his mouth at first as he stared between the family members in surprise, and then with a shake of the head, he finished, "exactly the thing." Clapping eyes on to Frederick.

Drawing the cloak from his shoulder as instructed, he tried to meet Hannah's eyes with trepidation, attempting to gently touch her wrist as he passed it to her, to show her he was still going to do as they agreed. Only Hannah hated being touched at the best of times, but her parents had now decided they were about to be married. When he'd begrudgingly agreed to come with her and play the part as she had accidentally played it for him, he hadn't had much time to consider what 'normal' couples did to complete the whole picture, to make it look authentic. Adding the assumption he'd also proposed to their daughter indicated a certain further advancement in familiarity.

"Cynthia, whatever you're cooking smells delicious," The only non Bombay in the kitchen composed his face into something more cordial, moving the conversation on from Cynthia and Frederick's surprise at finding out their daughter was a werewolf from the newspaper. Johann had found out in much the same way, but he didn't expect Hannah to tell him everything. He didn't tell her everything. She didn't want to know everything either. She'd probably hex him into next week if she did.

Two could play at this game, Johann followed Hannah's mother one step behind in the kitchen, adopting his familiar look of curiosity which he generally reserved to the goings on of the Ministry atrium, pub or a very interesting article. Cooking didn't really capture his interest, although he'd learned a considerable amount about it since moving in with Colin, and between his two wolf friends, he'd got rather good at cooking very rare steaks...

He stole a glance back at Hannah to check if he was following orders well enough, and then received the whiskey from Frederick, uttering sincere thanks. Feeling he'd shown enough interest for that moment on the food - his plan of potentially getting under foot might also have begun to work - he retreated to the other side and smiled broadly at Hannah before her father.

"Thank you for having us both for Christmas dinner. We'd have you over for new years, only... well..."

Johann seemed to ignore the conflict between Hannah and her much disliked mother and happily went to suck up to her, playing the dutiful boyfriend as Hannah left the kitchen to hang their cloaks up in the hallway. And she loitered there, focusing on her breathing to calm down enough to not want to throw her mother on the grill.

“Oh it’s just something I threw together in a pan, Your Ham. But so lovely of you to say so!” Cindy grinned, blushing as she flicked her wand at the casserole, charming the oversized wooden spoon to start stirring.

“Something that’s taken her all morning and she would have started last week if she knew our daughter’s fiancé was coming for dinner.” Fred added, handing Johann the tumbler of whiskey before he turned to his wife. “And it’s Johann sweetie. The boy isn’t a joint of pork.”

Cynthia instantly looked even redder as she clapped a hand over her mouth.  “Oh goodness me, Yarn, what you must think of me! Marrying my daughter and I can’t even say your name right!”  Ignoring the casserole, the witch rushed back over to Johann and laid a hand on his arm, squeezing it. “Oh you will forgive me won’t you dear? I’m just all of a flutter! Annie’s never brought a boy home before. In fact, she’s never home! And now she’s brought you to join the family…”

“Johann?” Hannah was now stood at the door, frowning. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Don’t you like casserole?”

Complimenting Cynthia on her cooking seemed to work - the arguments over werewolves stopped as quickly as they started, though Johann had a feeling that wasn't the end of the subject for the day by any stretch of the imagination.

Had he been less of a coward he might have intervened and stood up for Hannah, but as it was, he feared the casserole might have gone over his head or some more squeezing from Cynthia if Hannah hadn't felt the need to tear his eyes out for getting involved. He wasn't sure - a part of him wondered if she had wanted him to agree to leaving and going for steak. It was certainly simpler, and he was one for running...

Frederick was politely correcting his wife on his name, which Johann gave a thankful nod over. It wasn't unusual for people to struggle with it - particularly if they'd seen it on paper first. They'd try to call him John. He could cope with Yarn... it was at least something kittens played with rather than a mud-wallowing animal.

“Oh goodness me, Yarn, what you must think of me! Marrying my daughter and I can’t even say your name right!”

Johann had taken a sip of firewhiskey and when his ears understood marrying my daughter he almost spat it back out again which resulted in a need to cough. Cynthia had latched onto his arm again...

“Oh you will forgive me won’t you dear? I’m just all of a flutter! Annie’s never brought a boy home before. In fact, she’s never home! And now she’s brought you to join the family…”

“Johann? You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Don’t you like casserole?”

"No I love it, I just - the firewhi... never brought anyone home?" Johann suddenly turned to Cynthia who was attached to his arm, "I feel honoured." He looked back to Hannah, "I think?" And then mouthed, married? That really wasn't part of the agreement - Hannah hadn't told them they were going to get married had they? He'd thought it was a bit of a joke a moment ago.

"Darling, you shouldn't have hidden so much from your dear parents." Johann added pointedly, and then smiled to Frederick and raised his tumbler again, "Good stuff indeed, thank you," and took a hearty sip, hoping it might make it easier on the whole pinching, squeezing... marriage thing.

Roll on dinner...

In the dining room…

Johann had been acting all weird. He was more nervous than he should have been dealing with a simple falsehood for her parents. Could the wizard not cope with being his friend’s fake suitor for a day when she’d had to endure so much because of his lies regarding their relationship? Hannah had asked him to do this one thing for her and now he seemed skittish, unable to deal with the occasion. She had to have a word with him about it. But not in front of her nosy parents. They really were too much. There was a reason Hannah very rarely visited the couple.

The temptation to down a glass of wine before the meal was almost too much for Hannah. But she didn’t need to be intoxicated and have to deal with her parents. An even larger family rift would probably appear then if she had a looser tongue.

But now they were in the dining room alone while Fred and Cindy dished up in the kitchen. Hannah took this opportunity to grab Johann by his arm and drag him into the corner of the room. With that the witch leaned forward on her tiptoes, getting her face close to his.

“What’s eating you, Johann? You said you’d do this for me. One afternoon without being skittish. It’s one minuscule untruth.” From the kitchen Hannah could hear her mother shouting orders at Frederick.

"Minuscule?" Johann whispered back, "They think we're getting married!"

He paused, looking like a rabbit in headlights suddenly, and added in a slightly graver whisper,

"We're not... are we?"

Noise from the kitchen interrupted them a moment and his eyes flitted to the door, checking if they would be interrupted.

"I don't... you know I don't do this sort of thing. I agreed to be your 'boyfriend' alright, I didn't agree to - oh Merlin." He drew himself up straighter and leaned back away from Hannah slightly, "I know better than to argue with that expression." Raising both hands up in surrender, he peered down his nose cautiously at Hannah, as if one might do to a rather agressive dog that was growling at your feet.

"Alright, but this better not get out of this house!" Johann whispered finally, letting his arms flop to his sides again.

“MARRIED?!” Came the strained whisper from the healer, staring in shock at Johann. She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t know how to react. She didn’t have time to attempt either.

“Dinner is served darlings!” Cynthia bustled in carrying the enormous cauldron full of casserole. Not your normal Christmas dinner but the Bombays were not your normal family. “Oh do put her down, Yarn! That’s my baby girl you’re trying to smooch in the corner!” The witch giggled and placed the casserole down on the table. Behind her Frederick entered carrying more food which he deposited and promptly went to sit at the head of the table.

“Not there Freddie! We’ve got a new man of the house now. Yarn, you can sit at the head of the table, sweetie. Have you ever had Italian Casserole before? It’s daddy’s favourite. He’s Italian, my dear. Well, his family were. It’s that lovely? Very exotic. Just like you! Now come now, sit sit. Eat, be merry.”

Hannah gave one more glance at Johann. She couldn’t say anything now her parents were back. Neither could she put her parents straight. They would never hear the end of it. So she gave Johann an apologetic look before turning back to the dinner table.
“It looks delicious, mum.” The healer frowned and moved towards the table. “You know…me and Johann…we’re not…” Both parents looked up, staring at Hannah with interest. She couldn’t do it. “able to stay too late today. I’m…on the night shift.” She lied badly.

How had she not caught that? Johann flailed momentarily, but it was partly the shock of being interrupted by Cynthia with dinner.

Ushered to the head of the table, Johann took his place a little awkwardly. He'd never been the 'head' of the table before - being no father, no husband. That was always his father's place, or his mother's, she liked to sit between them when Johann had lived with them as a teenager. Thank goodness it wasn't turkey then, he'd have to carve it, or attempt to.

“It looks delicious, mum. You know…me and Johann…we’re not…” Johann's heart stopped a moment, wondering if she'd put them right just like that. Hannah was bold enough, she put Johann in his place many a time.
“able to stay too late today. I’m…on the night shift.”

Merlin damn it!

He stared in Hannah in dismay. He clocked Hannah's parents glancing his way and realised he couldn't now cover it, so played along.
"Oh yes, I quite forgot, she is." Johann followed, continuing to look a little disappointed, but pretending it was because they couldn't stay too long.
"What time did we need to get you home to get ready was it..." Johann shot his friend - or in this case, wife to be - a look to supply the earliest time they might get away with.

"They work them so very hard at St Mungo's. Poor cab- flower." Heck - that was close. Johann's unfamiliarity with romantic quips in English had almost led him to use mon petit chou but in literal English translation.

The casserole made its way to their plates, and wine into their glasses, and Johann felt for one moment he might risk relaxing a bit, smiling appreciatively towards Hannah's parents for their hospitality. Raising his glass, he glanced about the table,
"To family." He proposed, "Thank you for having us."

At this rate he was going to sleep through Boxing Day through sheer exhaustion of having to behave like a normal, respectable wizard.

It sounded like Johann very nearly called his apparent Fiancé a cabbage. Hannah gaped at him in bewilderment, wondering just what exactly had brought about such a bizarre moniker. It must have been some weird German custom. Or did he really like cabbage so much he was under the misguided conception that it made sense to call a fake girlfriend a vegetable. In that case Johann Storm was about to become Hannah’s big broccoli for the afternoon.

“Three!” Bombay finally jumped in. “We must be gone by three.” That was in an hour and a half. How perfect. Dinner would be done and there would be no awkward remaining behind as they felt they needed to. But there was still the small matter of an alleged marriage to rectify. Hannah just didn’t know how to.

Now Hannah Bombay was blunt with just about everyone she knew. She wasn’t aware of the definition of tact or trying to sugar coat things. She favoured a simple truth and often found that this landed her in trouble and with a fair amount of people that were not particularly forthcoming with her. But Healer Bombay didn’t favour complete honestly regarding her parents.  She hadn’t even bothered to inform them of becoming a werewolf. Why would she try to negotiated the topic that Johann was in fact not her fiancé when she hadn’t even introduced him as her boyfriend?

"To family." Johann raised his glass "Thank you for having us." Hannah and her parents toasted.

“You’re welcome anytime, Yarn, darling.” Cindy addressed her future son while she spooned a healthy amount of casserole onto her husband’s plate.  Fred and Hannah exchanged a look. “So how did you propose, my dear? Oh was it romantic? I bet it was. I bet she didn’t appreciate it.” Hannah failed to miss the dark look cast in her direction before the blue eyed gaze fell sweetly once more on the linguist.

“He didn’t propose, mother.” Hannah finally stated blutly, quickly getting sick of the company at the table. “We’re not engaged.”

Cindy’s smile dropped and she starred at her daughter. “Oh. You lied?” She turned her attention on Johann again. “I’m not surprised you haven’t proposed, Yarn. Who would want to marry my daughter?”

“So how did you propose, my dear? Oh was it romantic? I bet it was. I bet she didn’t appreciate it.”

No engagement ring on Hannah's hand, Johann considered, as Cynthia asked. He was looking down at his plate as the question landed, which gave him time to think without revealing his expression. This could quite possibly be the longest hour and a half of his life until three o'clock.

“He didn’t propose, mother. We’re not engaged.” Johann's head snapped up and looked at Hannah in surprise - not because of the fact she wasn't playing along, but because she'd decided to say something instead.

“Oh. You lied?” Hannah's mother retorted, and Johann looked to Cynthia instinctively as she'd spoken. The woman looked straight at him.
“I’m not surprised you haven’t proposed, Yarn. Who would want to marry my daughter?”

He gaped at her, frowned and managed to find his voice.

"I would." He replied without hesitation, rather offended that his friend's mother had spoken like that. So what if Hannah had kept her lycanthropy a secret from her parents, she'd also kept it a secret from Johann. But with people like his father, and now, Hannah's mother (Merlin they'd make a pair!) in the world, it was little surprise there was need to keep quiet.

"Your daughter's been through a lot this year, and she's dealt with it impeccably, as she does everything. I'm proud to have her as a friend," Johann mentally checked himself, "and beside me," that'd have to do. For good measure he reached out a hand to Hannah's hand, a little clumsily, he was trembling with speaking up to the woman who had just clung to his arm. It could be the casserole dish or a pan to the head next.

"And its Johann." He added firmly. "If you don't mind."

It wasn’t Cynthia’s comment that surprised Hannah the most. It was Johann’s response to it. The healer was used to an unpleasant mother’s criticisms and horrible comments. Cindy Bombay was not all sugar and kisses. In her daughter’s opinion she was unkind and cruel. And normally Johann was so...clumsy with words, awkward around humans. It’s why they got along. But now he was being like a regular less awkward person. He was sticking up for his friend.

Of course Hannah gawked at him. Did he just say that he would marry her? Had she heard him right? She knew her senses were always very alert now but were they struggling today? Had the wine affected her hearing?

Too distracted by staring at Storm in shocked amazement, Hannah failed to notice him reaching out to take her hand in this. When their skin touched she stiffened but she did not pull away. She could feel him shaking. Her gaze swept from his face to her mother’s. Cindy looked utterly perturbed, not knowing how to respond to her daughter’s friend.

“So…” The witch looked far more uncomfortable now, less quick to jump on an assault of her daughter or Yarn, your ham or whatever his name was.

Instead Fred sat up, “It’s nice to see you care for our daughter, Johann. I’d quite happily take you for a son in law.”

“We’re not getting married, Pa. And with her display,” Hannah indicated her mother, “Johann won’t want to speak to me after today. Johann, Mother. Not Your Ham, not Yarn. And he’s German, not Dutch or Pekingese or whatever else your blonde brain can contemplate.” The healer took a large gulp of her wine.