The Ministry could become suffocating, and on this early October day, London outside was inviting Johann for a wander. Muggles were the most interesting people to observe, what with their strange technology (which Colin adored but still baffled Johann).

Throwing on his coat (he preferred it to robes, and besides it was less conspicuous on these Muggle-observation excursions) Johann made his way out of the Ministry and into Muggle London.

The air was filled with the smell of pollution, dirty concrete, takeaways and all manner of passing nostril delights between. Autumn was beginning, a chill hung in the air as he wandered down the side street, making his usual route around the block.

Today, he paused by the cafe. The establishment's entrance was just off the corner of the main road, and had tables outside for patrons who wished to smoke. Muggles disagreed with smoking indoors these days, and those who did were forced outside in coats to inhale their own poisons.

Unusually, he felt hungry, so lingered a moment in consideration before shoving a hand into his coat pocket and withdrawing it again to study whether he had suitable Muggle currency.

As he surmised he would not, he dropped the galleons and knuts back into his pocket and happened to look through the window to spot a familiar face. Francis Pepper was sat alone within, and his expression was rather serious. Johann, being Johann, did not hesitate a moment in thinking Francis had sought the place to be alone and anonymous, amongst non-magicals, and instead stepped inside.

Besides, Francis Pepper always had Muggle money.

The tea was nothing special, but it sufficed, and it was good to be amongst Muggles for a while. Things were altogether more stable, organised and they left him be. Lunch in the Ministry would herald interruptions and the requirement to be pleasant to people.

He'd told Theta he was popping out, and had given her instructions for the afternoon to write up the repairs log. She had neater handwriting, and it was all good learning.

Francis was quite surprised to see Johann loom before him in the coffee shop, and immediately thought something was amiss. He'd never come here with a colleague or magical person, apart from Claire that one time… so many years ago.

"Johann!" Francis greeted, not sure whether he was pleased about his friend's presence or altogether indifferent.

"I didn't know you came here…?"

"I don't, I pass, but its the first time I have been inside." Johann informed him, and sat down opposite him without invitation. That was Johann. Undoubtedly he had no Muggle money either.

"Did you want a cup of tea or something?" Francis asked, deciding to be polite. "You can pay me back. Here, this is enough for what I'm drinking, and another for me please… its called breakfast tea." Counting out the smaller Muggle coins on his weathered palm, Francis handed over enough to pay for two drinks, and ushered Johann to the counter.

Muggle money was so tiny! Johann almost dropped it over the glass counter as he paid for the drinks. The staff behind the counter appeared hurried and not in the mood to deal with customers who had not prepared change, or were able to snatch up their goods and hurry away. It was the case across London, the same way everyone walked at such a swift pace unless they were tourists. Everyone hurrying because they had no time, or hurrying to give the impression they had purpose in their lives even if hurrying nowhere.

Thankfully Francis had given him exact change, so he was dispensed of it all in the woman's outstretched palm with relief. Two cups of tea landed between them with a clank. Seeing no milk, he enquired with half a question before being interrupted by his hostess pointing to a collection of condiments and additions beside the counter. It appeared her function was just to provide hot water into vessels with the appropriate second ingredient rather than provide all items for potions. He negotiated the various odd items onto the saucers before carrying the two drinks back to the table.

"Thanks, I'll pay you back in our currency, if that's ok?" Johann offered, reaching into his pocket, but Francis held up a hand and uttered later.

"I haven't seen you around a while, Pepper, well, other than with Gabie. How's things?" Johann asked, wrestling with the milk (he'd ascertained by the fact it had a cow on the front). On sipping the tea and finding it to be lukewarm to his dismay. He instinctively reached for his wand and then stopped, remembering himself.

The other side of the table, Francis cast aside the salt that Johann had accidentally picked up instead of a sugar sachet.

"Things have been better." Francis sighed, stirring his tea. His shoulders drooped, and his curls fell forward, then as if hearing himself as a bystander, his worries tumbled out.

"Have you ever wondered how easy it would be to end it all?" The unspeakable asked, his eyes staring out of the window, and new cup of tea between his fingers.

"Merlin, if I knew you were going to ask that I'd have taken you to the pub." Johann replied, surprised. "If you ask Colin its altogether too easy."

Francis blinked slowly and turned back to look at Johann's wide eyes with intrigue. Colin would know, indeed, and would know what would be discovered. Then, he realised that Johann was on this occasion, genuinely surprised.

"Things are fine." He assured his foreign friend. "I just needed some time to think, and being here means I'm left alone to do so." There was an uncomfortable pause between them, and Francis sighed and put his tea down again, unsipped. He would need to elaborate, Johann might think he was considering running away or deserting his post.

"Its Claire, Johann. She's not getting better, they're trying all they can, but I don't believe she ever will."

Johann took a larger sip of tea, and placed it down on the cafe table top before studying Francis carefully. People said he was an awful person to give advice about emotional things, though he seemed to be the one his friends had begun to choose to candidly discuss family genealogy issues and now, mentally ill wives.

"Minds are complicated." Johann uttered in response, not quite sure what to say. "Is she still happy?" He added after a moment. Happiness had a huge influence on decisions of other people.

The way his friend's eyes slid away from Johann's suggested that Francis Pepper doubted his ill wife was happy any more, that he couldn't tell. She had become so distant from him.

"Are you happy?" He asked, "You don't look it, you look miserable. You look like you've aged a few years, more than you do technically anyway with the turners, but, you don't look happy now."

"Thanks." Francis uttered from the other side of the table, his tone sarcastic. Johann did not seem to realise he had been more blunt than was socially acceptable.

"You look happy when you're with Gabrielle." Johann added in a softer voice.

Francis Pepper looked up in surprise.

Johann was right, which was what made Francis reply with the sarcasm. He was absolutely, incredibly right. Francis Pepper was miserable. His sons were at Hogwarts, the house was empty, and his wife no longer recognised him, and appeared to dislike him. He no longer recognised her either.

"Yes, yes I am." The unspeakable confirmed, nodding and giving a bittersweet smile. Gabrielle Murray-Harker was the greatest mistake of his life, to have let her go, not to have held on a little for her, to come round to the idea that they had a future together. It was hard though, sometimes the time wasn't right just then, but would be later. To Francis now was the time, but the situation was over complicated.

"You know she was my sweetheart, that I wanted to spend my life with her?" He asked Johann, "Well, I should have persisted." Pepper's tone was entirely pessimistic.

Johann wasn't quite sure what to do with a miserable Francis. The man was usually patient, optimistic and well respected in the Ministry. People who knew of him did speak of the 'terrible accident' that had beset his wife over a year ago, but those who knew him considered him a strong, father figure with a level head and good advice. He'd always been a little sad about Claire, but confident the healers would help her. It appeared he had lost hope altogether.

A silence passed between them, and Johann looked at his friend intently, his mind recalling the phrasing a moment ago end it all.

"I believe I understand what you are thinking of doing."

Francis Pepper looked startled across the table from him in an unsettling manner. Even thought Johann had merely alluded to knowledge, Francis had a guilty enough conscience for considering it. Would Francis carry such a deed out? Hopefully not, but desperate men...

"I think you will regret it."

As he got over the initial shock of Johann's sudden insight (though if anyone was going to piece a jigsaw together it could be Storm), he leaned forward a little and hushed his voice.

"What other options do I have?" He appealed, "The boys have no mother, I have no wife. She is locked in there," he tapped his temple, "without knowing who she is or what happens between hours, sedated. I'm still married to her," he raised his hand to show his wedding band, "though I know we have no future. She has become someone else."

His hand fell back to the sticky table top, ring clanking as it met the surface. The gaze between them was maintained, and Francis could read a mix of disgust, doubt and defiance from his companion's face. Johann couldn't understand him, Francis knew the German had unconventional and detached thoughts about family, relationships and decision making. He seemed unable to understand emotional issues.

"She would be out of hell, and the whole family would be released, we could get on with our lives." Francis pulled at his curly hair, "She's as good as dead to the boys already."

Johann exhaled deeply, dropping eye contact as he considered. Francis was cracking.

"What does Gabrielle think about this?" He asked calmly, "She doesn't approve does she?"

The question was rhetorical. Johann was sure that Gabie would not approve of any such drastic matters.

The silence that fell across the slightly sticky table as the Muggles bustled around them and the till rattled was telling. Johann's eyes met his older friend's pair with an intense stare, and paid proper attention as if he were a stranger. He stood in the atrium every morning observing people he knew of but had yet to work with or speak to and saw and made well educated guesses on their habits and beliefs, but the closer these people came to being friends the less attention he paid to the small details. They were readily sharing their lives with him verbally and by including him in them, and they tended to become disinteresting.

At that very moment however, Johann took a pinch of common sense and gave Francis Pepper his undivided attention. Because that was what friends did for each other - Adelia had informed him of such once on one of their many weekend and holiday excursions as an intern to the Department. He found himself suddenly imagining what a teenage, almost adult Hufflepuff would have done sat this side of the table, listening to the conversation between them, and awkwardly reached out to put a hand to Pepper's hand beside his tea.

The uncomfortable silence was broken by Johann reaching over to try and take his hand. The motion was awkward and unexpected, and Francis withdrew his hand and looked elsewhere swiftly, before shooting Johann a pointed and firm stare. The younger man paused, surprised, withdrew his hand and looked thoughtful, shaking his head ever so slightly.

No, Gabrielle would not approve, but ultimately if she loved him, she would support his decision. She was doing marvellously now she had returned, discussing how she might spend time with the boys, giving them a mother figure. Theta was overjoyed to see her presence, to see Francis smile about it. His niece was convinced his sons would be convinced that Gabrielle was a worthy mother-figure, though would never replace their own. But they needed someone to be there, both the boys, and Francis. His niece just wanted to see him happy.

"I shouldn't have said anything." The unspeakable uttered, sipping his rapidly cooling tea before setting it aside. "I just have a lot on my mind Johann. This is why I came here to think. I know you mean well, but, not right now, there's a fellow." He gave Johann a curt nod and got up. "Thanks for trying." He patted his colleague's shoulder before leaving.

Johann watched him through the glass, and rubbed his chin thoughtfully a minute. Then, snatching up the mug of tea, he headed out of the door, ignoring the protests of the Muggle staff asking him not to steal their crockery.

Less than fifteen minutes later he reached Gabrielle's office door.



End