Dear Mom and Dad,

everything´s fine. I´m doing great in school and I´ve already found lots of friends. We have strange subjects like Transfiguration and Defense Against the Dark Arts Charms, but no Maths or Geography - not that I terribly mind. The Charms teacher is a dotty old chap, and Madam Hooch whom you know teaches Flying, which went rather well. She makes sure we´re safe at all times. One girl crashed into a tree and went completely hysterical, bleeding all over the place, but I made sure to stay close to the ground. There´s a werewolf girl here too, she´s in my house, she´s very nice, and another girl who keeps pestering me, but I ignore her.

Marlon set his pen down and sighed. He´d have to rewrite the whole letter. He had started off so well, pretending everything was just hunky dory; but the truth always seeped out, and now the letter was nearly illegible with all the scratched out parts. He couldn´t let his parents know what this place really was really like; the mere mention of a class that taught you to Defend yourself against something called Dark Arts would scare his mother to death, and the fact that he shared a house with a werewolf would send his father up here with the next train to pick him up (though his brother would probably squeal with delight at the mere notion that werewolves actually exist).

It was late; most of his dorm mates had already gone to bed. A group of older Gryffindors was playing a game with enchanted dice in front of the fireplace, but Marlon blocked out their giggling and rough banter, preferring to pretend their voices didn´t reach him in his remote corner of the Common Room. He wouldn´t have considered it possible, but sometimes he actually missed his little brother. Darius was a pain in the neck, a popular kid who hung out with his gang far more than with his sickly older brother, but at least when they were at home, alone together, they were close as two peas in a pod. Marlon enjoyed bossing Darius around, and Darius hadn´t yet fully overcome the natural admiration younger brothers feel for their older brothers, so much cleverer and world-wiser than the wide-eyed younger siblings; he willingly let Marlon dictate their games, lecture him or talk down to him, never questioning the older boy´s natural superiority. Marlon kind of missed that. There was no one here to feel superior over - quite the contrary. Most of his year mates were far more confident than he, most of them could do magic better and, rather infuriatingly, most of them were even better in muggle things like football. He would never have thought that he would ever miss Darius. In fact, he had been glad to get away from him, to go on an exciting adventure that, for once, he would not have to share with his little brother.

A shadow fell over the parchment, and hastily he folded up the letter and threw a glance over his shoulder to see who had approached him.

Lexi tossed and turned in bed, there was no way that she could fall asleep. Too many thought were speeding through her mind, she had been meaning to send her parents a letter, but she didn't want anything to do with them after her mom had refused to reply back to any other letter that she had sent. With a sigh, she tugged back the covers and tied her hair back in a ponytail. She shuffled her feet across the room over to the doorway that would lead her down into the common room.

She yawned a little, abnormal yawn for her. Normally, she would yawn this big, huge, not-so-lovely yawn... Lexi shook off the drowsiness and spotted Marlon sitting by the fire. She walked over and noticed that he was writing something, a letter maybe. "Whatcha writing?" She asked, sitting down next to him.

Thump - thump - thump - thump… the slightest excitement sent his heart racing, like someone approaching him when he wasn´t expecting it - even if it was just Lexi. Marlon grimaced, gritting his teeth while trying to breathe calmly and steadily. Short intake of breath, long exhale… short intake, long exhale. He was well aware that he must look like a fish out of water to Lexi. That knowledge didn´t help to soothe his bouncy heart.

“A letter,” he managed to say. “To my parents. They expect me to write once a week, but I… well…”
He shrugged, using the pause to draw in another breath and exhale slowly. His heartbeat was almost at a normal pace again, though still unsteady, like a drunk stopping on the street for no reason and then lurching forward to make up for time lost. Stupid pump.

“I don´t know what to write. There´s so many things they wouldn´t understand. They´re just normal people - muggles, you would call them.”

That wasn´t too far from the truth, though it wasn´t the real reason. But he didn´t want to seem weak in front of Lexi… oh boy, who are you kidding? Marlon thought sarcastically to himself. If she hadn´t noticed by now that something was off about him, she must be exceptionally inattentive. And he knew her well enough by now to know that she wasn´t. 

A puzzled look flickered across Lexi's face as she watched Marlon breathe in and out different amounts of breath. It was odd, but she dismissed it as just a reaction from nervousness. He was a shy kid after all, not one to take the first step to talk, so maybe by walking up to him and just sitting down was a little too forward. Whoops.

“I don´t know what to write. There´s so many things they wouldn´t understand. They´re just normal people - muggles, you would call them.” Marlon said.

"My dad's a muggle, I write to him alot. But I agree with you, I never know what to write because it's difficult to explain to him... And I don't talk to my mom, so I'm walking blind here because she's a witch but there's no way she'd ever answer my letters." Lexi gave a fake laugh, covering up the dissapointment in her voice. She bit her lower lip awkwardly, not knowing what to say.

"Do you normally stay up this late to write? I mean, it's fine, the fire's nice and all. But don't you get lonely?" She asked. Lexi didn't know what she'd do without her friends or people to talk to. It'd be wierd without a person by her side to just chat with sometimes.

So Lexi´s dad was a muggle, but her mum was a witch. That raised all sorts of new questions – how had they met, and when exactly did the magical part of a partnership decide to disclose their magical nature, and wasn´t that a breach of the, what was it called, Law of Secrecy that forbid wizarding folks to tell normal people about the existence of the magical world?

Marlon´s heart rate had normalized (thankfully), and he slid back into a more comfortable position on the lush carpet, leaning back against the sofa behind him. Lexi was in sleeping clothes, her hair pulled up into a ponytail. The firelight caught in her copper hair, making it look like she was on fire herself. It was a pretty effect, and Marlon caught himself staring at it for a moment longer than was strictly appropriate. But she was talking about her parents now, a bitter tone in her voice, and there was a chance she hadn´t noticed.

He wanted to ask why she didn´t talk to her mum – Marlon could hardly imagine not talking to either of his parents, it was an almost frightening thought – but he didn´t quite know how to inquire about such a delicate subject, and then she started talking again.

“Lonely? Uh, I dunno…” Marlon shrugged, a little lost. He did feel lonely, yes; but then, that was a familiar feeling, and one that he didn´t think of as particularly bad. Sure, he was lonelier now than he had ever been at home – at least there were his parents and brother – but he wasn´t used to having lots of friends around him, so that was no big change.

“I don´t mind being alone. Actually… I´d prefer a little more privacy around here. There´s always people around, you can´t be alone anywhere, not even while sleeping. I used to complain about stuff, back home; but now I think that if only I got my own room back, a room that I didn´t have to share with anybody, I wouldn´t complain about a single thing anymore.”

Then he realized that she might take this the wrong way, and he cast her a quick glance from under his eyelashes, reddening slightly.

“I mean, I don´t mean you… I like your company… it´s just, I´m not used to sleeping in a dorm. And Edmund snores.”

"Oh, some of my dorm mates snore as well. It keeps me up late because I'm such an insomniac already, the snoring just makes it worse." Lexi sighed and pulled her legs in up close to her chest, resting her head on her knees. She stared at the bright fire that was flickering in front of them, for a moment captured by it's raw beauty.

Then she turned back to Marlon, "Are you alright?" She asked. Marlon seemed distracted by the letter in his hands and just about everything else that was going on. "You seem...  a little off. Sorry if I'm being nosey."

She reached over and placed her hand on his shoulder reassuringly, hoping that if something was wrong, then maybe she could comfort him. After all, it's not like anybody else would do it. They were all too busy being caught up in their own little turf wars about old family fudes and the broken body parts that seemed to be frequent in their class.

A bout of laughter erupted across the room; someone must have won some game over there, as the  older Gryffindors gathered around one of them, patting his shoulder and shaking his hands and congratulating him, while the lucky boy grinned and graciously accepted the well wishes.

Marlon´s head jerked up at the sudden noise, but, finding that he was in no immediate danger, he turned away from his older house mates, a curious mixture of contempt and determination on his pale face.

“Are you alright?” Lexi asked, and he wasn´t sure whether it was because of his reaction to what was going on across the room or because of him staying up so late, sitting all alone in a corner, writing a letter.

"You seem...  a little off. Sorry if I'm being nosey."

He gave a short laugh. “Don´t worry, you´re not nosey. I know nosey people; that´s a whole different thing.”

Like this Alix girl, she was the embodiment of nosey; or some kids in his old school, who thought just because he was smaller and weaker than they, they could tease him or push him around. Of course, they were right in that; they could, and they did. Still, Marlon was perfectly able to tell the difference between people putting their nose in his business and people showing genuine concern, and Lexi was definitely doing the latter.

He shrugged again, unaware of what a frequent gesture that was becoming.

“I just miss home. It´s not so bad during the day, when there are a thousand things there to distract me, but it´s bad at night. My mum... she...”

He couldn´t speak anymore. Marlon felt his throat tighten, his eyes threatening to overflow. This was not good, oh no... the last thing he wanted was to start crying like a baby in front of Lexi. Even if she wasn´t one of the mean people who would make fun of him for that. He was fairly certain she´d be sympathetic... but somehow that was even worse.
For a few seconds, he said nothing, concentrating on fighting back the tears. Then he gulped, quietly, and cleared his throat.

“Well, I, er, I´m just not used to being away from my family. Not for such a long time at any rate. It doesn´t make it easier to know that it´s hard on them, too.”

He hadn´t meant to ask her; he wanted to respect her privacy, and anyway Marlon had never been the nosey kind himself. But now, with the catastrophe of his waterworks starting to run only barely avoided, he was glad for anything that directed the attention away from him.

“Why aren´t you talking to your mum?”

“I just miss home. It´s not so bad during the day, when there are a thousand things there to distract me, but it´s bad at night. My mum... she...”

Marlon turned away from Lexi and for a few moments, there was a silence between the two of them. It wasn't uncomftorable, just quiet, that's all.

“Well, I, er, I´m just not used to being away from my family. Not for such a long time at any rate. It doesn´t make it easier to know that it´s hard on them, too.”

"Same," Lexi said. "It's a long time and knowing something like that kind of makes you wish you were home." She paused, thinking about what else she was going to say when Marlon interupted her train of thought.

“Why aren´t you talking to your mum?”

Oof, and there's the million dollar question that somebody was bound to ask. Yes Lexi, she thought. Why aren't we talking to dear old mom?

"Er, well..." Lexi gulped, trying to cover the sudden awkwardness in her voice. Family was a touchy subject with most people, but for the moment she felt that she could tell Marlon anything, and that she could trust him to keep that something a secret. Unlike others that she knew who would blab as soon as the words got out of her mouth.

"Well she doesn't trust me, I geuss... after my... umm, incident, she just never seemed to like me after I became who I am." Lexi could feel an onslaught of tears just waiting to spring at the right moment, but for now she held them back, not wanting to seem weak. She laughed to distract Marlon from her sadness, "And it's wierd you know? She's a witch and I'd think that she'd get what's wrong with me and be accepting... but that's what my dad's doing and he's a muggle! A muggle..."

She sighed, and twiddled her thumbs, quite literally. Anything to distract herself from the what she was thinking. "Sorry, it didn't mean to go off like that."

The mere thought that your mum could turn away from you for whatever reason made Marlon cringe. Sure, he could see how the notion of living close to a werewolf - say, in the neighbourhood -  would make someone nervous; most people would be terrified, and some might even be openly hostile, even if the werewolf wasn´t to blame for his or her transformation. But family was different – especially your parents, they were supposed to love you more than their own lives. Marlon knew for a fact that his mother would willingly take his illness upon her if she only could, and the same went for his dad. He had never thought twice about it, either – it was just the way parents were wired, as natural as night and day.

“Is she… your step-mum or something?”

It might be insensitive, but Marlon couldn´t help it; he really wanted to know how it was possible for a mother to distance herself so from her child, and this was the only sensible explanation he could think of – that Lexi´s mother was not, in fact, her real mum.

“She doesn´t trust you like how? Does she think you could hurt her while in werewolf form? But that´s nonsense…”

The moment he said it, he realized he might be wrong there. He didn´t know much about werewolves, but actually, there was no reason to assume that they even knew who they really were while transformed; maybe a family member was just another piece of meat for them.

Marlon shifted uncomfortably, his hazel eyes searching Lexi´s face.

“Or is it? You do know who you are while you´re… while you´re in your wolf form, no? You wouldn´t hurt anyone you know.”

He tried to lend his voice a certain security, making it come across as a statement that he believed in rather than a question; but although the question might not be in his tone, it was in his eyes.

“Is she… your step-mum or something?” Marlon asked. Lexi could hear the confusion in his voice, and she knew it'd be a hard story to tell.

"No she's my real mom," she said. "I know it's wierd. I mean, how could a mom not trust her own daughter?" Lexi said, throwing her hands in the air.

“She doesn´t trust you like how? Does she think you could hurt her while in werewolf form? But that´s nonsense…”

"Well, she just doesn't talk to me. And when I tried to ask her if she was upset that I was a werewolf, she just gave me a mean  look and strutted away. I know it's nonsense, it's like she-" Lexi said before Marlon interupted her softly.

“Or is it? You do know who you are while you´re… while you´re in your wolf form, no? You wouldn´t hurt anyone you know.”

Lexi looked away from Marlon and folded her hands in her lap. She knew he was asking if she was stable while she was a wolf, and that he probably knew what she was about to say. His voice didn't betray the curiosity that anyone else would have, but his eyes, those adorable, questioning hazel eyes said it all.

"I don't know," she said, her voice soft like she was whispering. "I take the wolfsbane, so I can control myself a bit more, but I honestly have very few memories of what it's like to be a wolf. I remember slamming into the silver bars and burning myself, because I had the marks the next day, but that's all. Even if I knew who was standing by me when I shifted, I doubt I'd have enough control to not attack them." She paused, taking a deep breath and absent mindedly rubbed her scar.

"I just wish I knew, you know? It's like doing something, falling asleep, and waking up with no memory... no reminder. The only reminders I have are the scratches and bruises I inflict upon myself." She sighed and looked back at Marlon, "but I'd rather it be me than somebody else."

He had hoped she would say yes, she knew who she was and was in full control while transformed, and that her mother´s fears were absurd and born from superstition and prejudice; he had known she likely wouldn´t.

What surprised him was how calm he remained despite her revelation. Marlon wasn´t a particularly brave person; oh, in his dreams he was a superhero, strong and tough as nails, but dreams and reality were two very different things. While he didn´t mind blood and had even learned to shrug off the cuts and bruises he regularly got, monsters and other supernatural things scared the wits out of him. He had been scared of vampires and werewolves before he even knew that they actually existed (he still wasn´t sure about the vampires, but he wouldn´t bet his comics collection on them being only fiction), and now here he was sitting next to a real werewolf, talking to her as if she were just a regular person. And she had just told him that her werewolf self was ferocious enough to inflict wounds upon herself when she was prevented from going after others.

His body tensed, his muscles tightening, preparing to have him jump up and run in case of danger, but his mind was calm with only a hint of anxiousness, a normal survival instinct. It was a little awkward, being so close to someone who possessed such a dark, deathly secret, but the rational part of him knew that there was no imminent danger and that whatever Lexi might be during the full moon, right now she was just Lexi – the closest to a friend he had in this strange place.

And friends shared their secrets. He knew Lexi´s – it wasn´t a secret anymore, exactly, but still – and he wanted to give her something back for it.

“I can´t say I know how you feel. It must be terrible. But the part with losing your memory… well, I get that too.”

Marlon threw a quick look over his shoulder. The older Gryffindors at the far side of the room were again caught up in their game; none of them spared the two first years a glance. Nonetheless, Marlon lowered his voice.

“I get fainting spells every so often. I just keel over and then I´m out for a few seconds, sometimes longer. When I wake up, sometimes I don´t even remember what I was doing before I passed out.”

It hadn´t happened at Hogwarts yet; he was thankful for it, but knew that sooner or later it would happen here, too. He just hoped it wasn´t in flying class, when they were starting to climb greater heights.

Lexi listened as Marlon began to talk. Inside, she felt so relieved that she could confide in someone that wasn't so involved with the initial attack that turned her into a werewolf. The fact that someone could be so accepting after she dumped all that crap on him, well that was phenomenal. Plus, this was Marlon we were talking about. A shy, slightly timid little boy who was slowly coming out of his shell. At least that's how Lexi had thought of him at the beginning of the year.

Now, her views were much different. He was a bit funny, always there if she needed to talk, and he was a good person to be friends with. Not too rowdy and violent like the Slytherin boys, or friendly and loving like the Hufflepuffs. He was a perfect mix. With a bit of the Gryffindor qualities they all had somewhere, be it blaring and obvious, or subtle and deep down; there was a reason that Marlon was here.

“I get fainting spells every so often. I just keel over and then I´m out for a few seconds, sometimes longer. When I wake up, sometimes I don´t even remember what I was doing before I passed out.”

Lexi cocked her head to the side, confused, "You mean, like completely out? Is it like falling asleep and waking back up? Does it hurt?" She started asking before realizing how insensitive she was being.

"Sorry it's just, I don't know many others who've lost chunks of their memory like I have... and I just feel like now it the first time I can actually talk to a good friend without being judged."

“Yeah, completely out… but it´s not quite like falling asleep. It´s more like… uh, I dunno…”

His words trailed off, his gaze flickering insecurely. Marlon realized now that he´d gone too far to shy away from giving more details, which would in effect mean disclosing his condition to her. He hadn´t meant to do that, just give her a carefully selected piece of information, something they had in common, something to bond over. He was reluctant to give her the whole unpleasant truth. He had meant to start over new at this new school, after all – a place where he was not known as the weakling with the stuttering heart. Well, true, very likely he would soon be known as the weakling, full stop. But there might still be a chance that he could sway the opinion on him by doing something exceptionally clever, or turning out to be outstanding at something (though, truth be told, Marlon had only a very hazy idea on what that might be), or, whatever, rescuing the Headmaster from a mad intruder with a gun - naturally Marlon, being a muggleborn, would be the only one to recognize the deadly weapon, and he would warn Reid and thus ensure that the madman was captured and the Headmaster saved (he was aware that this fantasy still had a few logical flaws, but the details could be worked out later).

"Sorry it's just, I don't know many others who've lost chunks of their memory like I have... and I just feel like now it the first time I can actually talk to a good friend without being judged."

A good friend. So she actually thought of him as a good friend already? Marlon´s heart gave a tiny leap, but this time it wasn´t entirely unpleasant, and it went by so quickly that he didn´t even flinch.

“I have this condition, actually”, he heard himself say. “My heart doesn´t work quite right. Sometimes it starts racing, and I feel like I can´t breathe properly… and sometimes I get so dizzy that I pass out. Usually I have enough time to prepare, like sit down or at least position myself so that I don´t hurt myself too much when I fall. But sometimes I´m too late, and then I fall on something hard. Like the other time, I fell right on my brother´s toy railway. I still have a big bruise on my back from that. Darius was quite upset. It was his favourite train.” He shrugged, a dark smile flitting across his features. “Was his own fault, anyway. Shouldn´t have left it lying around.”

A heart condition, Lexi thought. Well it could be a whole lot worse. Wait...  was he really trusting her with this sort of information?

Wanting to do a victory dance at gaining his trust, Lexi settled for an internal congratulations as she nodded along with what he was saying. She did have to wonder though, how did Marlon get into Gryffindor? What was this little kid hiding inside of him that was waiting to burst out and amaze them all?

Lexi gasped when Marlon taled about the big bruise on his back, sounded really painful and Lexi could just feel the sharp stab in her back, even though there was nothing there. "Oh geez Mar," Lexi said with her new nickname for her fellow Gryffindor. "Pardon the bluntness, but that sucks!"

"Don't worry," she amended. "If you ever fall while I'm around, I'll catch you. Cross my heart." She said, making an imaginary 'x' across her chest with her pointer finger.

It might have been different were their genders reversed. If Marlon were a girl with a potentially fatal illness, and Lexi a tall, handsome boy (who turned into a strong, fierce animal in regular intervals) – that was the stuff romance novels were made of, after all. A girl might have been pleased by the boy´s gallant offer to catch her should she fall, perhaps even swoon at the thought of falling into his strong arms.

Marlon was not a girl, though, and he was mortified. Despite Lexi´s friendly attitude, he was also not entirely sure she wasn´t mocking him. If he had been, he would have called her out on it, but as it was, he just turned his head briskly and pulled his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around them.

“Yeah, whatever,” he muttered, fixing his gaze onto the carpet.